So, I am fully aware that this next post is going to make me sound kind of country. Which isn't necessarily a bad thing. But I digress. So the hubs likes to watch hunting shows... I watch them with him because life is just better when we are both tucked into our respective corners of the couch (no other place in this house is as comfy as our couch... it is has been independently tested!). But on to my point.
There are quite a few of these shows that like to showcase military things... wether that be tours of bases/posts or featuring a veteran on a hunt or (disgustingly) gratuitous shots of combat video to make the show seem cooler. I've seen it all. Now, the shows where the veteran (be they wounded or not) gets to go on a free hunt to say Hey! Thanks for what you've done! I have no problem with. I appreciate that someone is recognizing what these (generally speaking) men have done for our country and freedom/democracy of others. These individuals and their stories are prominently featured along with the tale of the hunt. All fine and well in my books. The ones where they just showcase Cool Military Stuff and/or People, not cool. But that should be obvious.
However, I've noticed that not a single one of these shows (other than Ted Nugent's)- regardless of the military content they include- advocates its viewers finding out more about any of the number of veteran's organizations or donate money to said programs. The best they usually get is a passing comment at the very end of the show... no links, no phone numbers, no prominent display of logos and no sliver of time featuring them or the work they do. No one mentions the Wounded Warrior Project. No one really talks about the organizations that often makes these hunts possible, Project Healing Waters, The Armed Forces Foundation and Wounded Warriors Outdoors. Why?
The overwhelming lack of promotion for these organizations makes me wonder if featuring the Armed Forces and our vets (especially the wounded ones) in these shows is really nothing more than old fashioned pandering. It shouldn't be a surprise that most hunters and fishermen are of the conservative persuasion... and heavily support our military (as all folks should, regardless of political persuasion)... so is this just a way to play to your audience? I sure hope not.
But, with all that said, I still can't help but wonder why so many of these shows, with captive and sympathetic audiences, don't take advantage of the opportunity to promote the great work they are doing and get more like-minded supporters.
Showing posts with label soapbox. Show all posts
Showing posts with label soapbox. Show all posts
19 October 2010
20 July 2010
DoD gets a big fat DO BETTER: MyCAA
I am sure you all have heard around the blog-o-sphere... but the DoD has reinstated the MyCAA program, only with some pretty massive changes. Here's the link directly to the press release: DOD to Resume Restructured Military Spouse Career Program
Okay, so first things first on my Bitch List (patent pending):
1. What the heck is with restricting these benefits to spouses of service members with pay grades E1 through E5, WO1-WO2 and O1-O2? That is effectively removing any Senior spouse from any benefits.
According to their press release, this segregation was put in place to help the spouses with the greatest need. I, for one, wholeheartedly disagree. Now, that isn't to say that those spouses aren't in need. It is me saying what does my spouse's rank have to do with need? Swiss is an E-8 and I, for all practical purposes, lost my hard earned career (which required extra schooling on top of my Bachelor's degree- this will be an important point in a minute) when we PCS's this last time. No jobs in the area and no other careers that would allow me to use my Cytology degree.
I am assuming that this "need" is likely financial, which I sort of get. However, I would then like to point out that for some of us with previously lucrative careers, loosing that income can have just as big of an impact on the household finances as that of any Junior spouse. Me? Leaving my job in Minnesota meant that we as a family made over $60,000.00 less this year. SIXTY THOUSAND DOLLARS. Less. Try to tell me that isn't justification for "need". To me, it is so naive to think that Senior spouses who loose careers and their families are less impacted by the lack of extra income. And it is a slap in the face to most Senior spouses who have endured tens of PCSes and have had to leave numerous jobs, resulting in resumes that look more like vacation itineraries, that their need isn't high enough because their spouse's rank is too high. In some regards, I think the senior spouses are the more likely to need the career guidance, the tweaks educational paths and the ones more in need of funding to help get new state certifications/licensure for pre-existing careers.
2. What the heck is with the funding only being available to those seeking Associates degrees, certifications or licensure?
Now, at the risk of sounding like a degree snob, rarely is an Associates degree the pathway to ANY career. Mostly, it is a pathway to a Bachelors degree- which is not permissible under this new program. If the real goal is to get spouses into portable careers that will help lend financial stability to the family and increase spouse morale... this ain't the way to do it. I fail to understand how limiting the types of degrees available to these spouses is helpful at all. What about the spouse one year away from finishing up a Bachelors degree? Too bad. What about one looking to get a Masters in Education to increase their odds of getting hired at a DoD school after their next PCS? Nope, not you! The spouse who wants to get a degree to be a therapist or counselor or social worker specifically to work with and help military families? HA! Why would the DoD help YOU?
Many of the spouses that I know who have truly portable careers, have much more than an Associates. And that isn't to say that it is impossible to get a great job/career with an Associates... but the DoD is encouraging a culture of underachieving. They are pushing spouses to get lesser degrees and maintain the norm of under-earning and flooded career paths. Not all of us can be medical transcriptionists or massage therapists. I do not approve.
I fail to see why the DoD is unwilling to let the spouses who qualify use the funds (which are fixed at $4,000 total, not to exceed $2,000/year) in any way they see fit. I would think that the end benefit from allowing these spouses get/finish advanced degrees would far outweigh any cons... and come to think of it, I can't come up with any cons. If the finances are fixed, it shouldn't matter what degree you get with that money.
And what is worse, is that the DoD is touting this as a vehicle to improve spouse morale and careers over time. Associates degrees and certifications WILL NOT do this. It is a band-aid at best on a wound that would be better served with stitches. To say it is shortsighted is not even the half of it. By targeting the younger spouses, it would make infinitely more sense to open the degree options up to the higher degrees to help create real career paths, rather than temporary ones, which is precisely what this format will do. Ask yourself: What will these spouses do in 5 years when advancement their field/career requires a Bachelors or Masters? You will have a generation of MilSpouses stalled out in entry-level careers. How is that fixing anything?
3. My biggest, over-arching problem with this re-vamp and the whole MyCAA debacle is that it is/was a failure to the greater MilSpouse community because the DoD just doesn't get it. There are promises of help and vows of caring... but the massive lack of useful, flexible, pro-active help for spouses only serves to illustrate how out of touch the DoD is with the problem
To say that they were caught off guard by the program's initial success and demand for services only goes to show that they never fully understood the MilSpouse career/education problem in the first place. I would guess that if any MilSpouse was asked if the program would be a raging success, they would have said yes without hesitation. Simply because we all understand how hard it is to get a good education or career that stays with you through years of military moves- and that the constant moves often lead to career do-overs and changes. The fact that the program was underfunded makes it ever-so apparent that the DoD has been (and still are) massively underestimating how big the issue is. Furthermore, by limiting the availability of the funding as well as the dollar amount AND the scope of its use, they aren't helping fix the problem for those who do qualify. They are only creating more of the same.
To say that I am frustrated by this turn of events is putting it mildly. I am not using this program and, frankly, even if I wanted to I couldn't (on like 3 counts). But, the bigger point is that in order to fix a problem, you first have to understand the root of it. Throwing money and restrictions at the problem will likely only lead to business as usual. Until the DoD chooses to TRULY understand why this is an issue for so many of us, why an Associates or certification isn't enough, why basing one's access to funding on their spouse's pay grade is just plain ridiculous, and that their idea of who and what a MilSpouse is (and what his/her goals might be) just might be stuck in the 50's, no augmentation to a program like this will result in true change.
I am disappointed in you DoD. It is one thing to bail on or modify promises, but it is an entirely different offense to fail (willingly or unwillingly) to understand the people you are claiming to be so committed to. It isn't help if it doesn't lead to change. And if you are so unwilling to understand our issues at their core, no number of programs, no amount of money, no level of "commitment" will ever improve the situation. So yes, you get a big fat Do Better. And don't expect a "Thank You" for the slap in the face either.
PS- for other takes on the MyCAA Hott Mess... check out the blog roll on the right. I think the top 10 are mostly posts on this very issues. The Natives are NOT happy folks! Pipe up and share you frustrations!
Okay, so first things first on my Bitch List (patent pending):
1. What the heck is with restricting these benefits to spouses of service members with pay grades E1 through E5, WO1-WO2 and O1-O2? That is effectively removing any Senior spouse from any benefits.
According to their press release, this segregation was put in place to help the spouses with the greatest need. I, for one, wholeheartedly disagree. Now, that isn't to say that those spouses aren't in need. It is me saying what does my spouse's rank have to do with need? Swiss is an E-8 and I, for all practical purposes, lost my hard earned career (which required extra schooling on top of my Bachelor's degree- this will be an important point in a minute) when we PCS's this last time. No jobs in the area and no other careers that would allow me to use my Cytology degree.
I am assuming that this "need" is likely financial, which I sort of get. However, I would then like to point out that for some of us with previously lucrative careers, loosing that income can have just as big of an impact on the household finances as that of any Junior spouse. Me? Leaving my job in Minnesota meant that we as a family made over $60,000.00 less this year. SIXTY THOUSAND DOLLARS. Less. Try to tell me that isn't justification for "need". To me, it is so naive to think that Senior spouses who loose careers and their families are less impacted by the lack of extra income. And it is a slap in the face to most Senior spouses who have endured tens of PCSes and have had to leave numerous jobs, resulting in resumes that look more like vacation itineraries, that their need isn't high enough because their spouse's rank is too high. In some regards, I think the senior spouses are the more likely to need the career guidance, the tweaks educational paths and the ones more in need of funding to help get new state certifications/licensure for pre-existing careers.
2. What the heck is with the funding only being available to those seeking Associates degrees, certifications or licensure?
Now, at the risk of sounding like a degree snob, rarely is an Associates degree the pathway to ANY career. Mostly, it is a pathway to a Bachelors degree- which is not permissible under this new program. If the real goal is to get spouses into portable careers that will help lend financial stability to the family and increase spouse morale... this ain't the way to do it. I fail to understand how limiting the types of degrees available to these spouses is helpful at all. What about the spouse one year away from finishing up a Bachelors degree? Too bad. What about one looking to get a Masters in Education to increase their odds of getting hired at a DoD school after their next PCS? Nope, not you! The spouse who wants to get a degree to be a therapist or counselor or social worker specifically to work with and help military families? HA! Why would the DoD help YOU?
Many of the spouses that I know who have truly portable careers, have much more than an Associates. And that isn't to say that it is impossible to get a great job/career with an Associates... but the DoD is encouraging a culture of underachieving. They are pushing spouses to get lesser degrees and maintain the norm of under-earning and flooded career paths. Not all of us can be medical transcriptionists or massage therapists. I do not approve.
I fail to see why the DoD is unwilling to let the spouses who qualify use the funds (which are fixed at $4,000 total, not to exceed $2,000/year) in any way they see fit. I would think that the end benefit from allowing these spouses get/finish advanced degrees would far outweigh any cons... and come to think of it, I can't come up with any cons. If the finances are fixed, it shouldn't matter what degree you get with that money.
And what is worse, is that the DoD is touting this as a vehicle to improve spouse morale and careers over time. Associates degrees and certifications WILL NOT do this. It is a band-aid at best on a wound that would be better served with stitches. To say it is shortsighted is not even the half of it. By targeting the younger spouses, it would make infinitely more sense to open the degree options up to the higher degrees to help create real career paths, rather than temporary ones, which is precisely what this format will do. Ask yourself: What will these spouses do in 5 years when advancement their field/career requires a Bachelors or Masters? You will have a generation of MilSpouses stalled out in entry-level careers. How is that fixing anything?
3. My biggest, over-arching problem with this re-vamp and the whole MyCAA debacle is that it is/was a failure to the greater MilSpouse community because the DoD just doesn't get it. There are promises of help and vows of caring... but the massive lack of useful, flexible, pro-active help for spouses only serves to illustrate how out of touch the DoD is with the problem
To say that they were caught off guard by the program's initial success and demand for services only goes to show that they never fully understood the MilSpouse career/education problem in the first place. I would guess that if any MilSpouse was asked if the program would be a raging success, they would have said yes without hesitation. Simply because we all understand how hard it is to get a good education or career that stays with you through years of military moves- and that the constant moves often lead to career do-overs and changes. The fact that the program was underfunded makes it ever-so apparent that the DoD has been (and still are) massively underestimating how big the issue is. Furthermore, by limiting the availability of the funding as well as the dollar amount AND the scope of its use, they aren't helping fix the problem for those who do qualify. They are only creating more of the same.
To say that I am frustrated by this turn of events is putting it mildly. I am not using this program and, frankly, even if I wanted to I couldn't (on like 3 counts). But, the bigger point is that in order to fix a problem, you first have to understand the root of it. Throwing money and restrictions at the problem will likely only lead to business as usual. Until the DoD chooses to TRULY understand why this is an issue for so many of us, why an Associates or certification isn't enough, why basing one's access to funding on their spouse's pay grade is just plain ridiculous, and that their idea of who and what a MilSpouse is (and what his/her goals might be) just might be stuck in the 50's, no augmentation to a program like this will result in true change.
I am disappointed in you DoD. It is one thing to bail on or modify promises, but it is an entirely different offense to fail (willingly or unwillingly) to understand the people you are claiming to be so committed to. It isn't help if it doesn't lead to change. And if you are so unwilling to understand our issues at their core, no number of programs, no amount of money, no level of "commitment" will ever improve the situation. So yes, you get a big fat Do Better. And don't expect a "Thank You" for the slap in the face either.
PS- for other takes on the MyCAA Hott Mess... check out the blog roll on the right. I think the top 10 are mostly posts on this very issues. The Natives are NOT happy folks! Pipe up and share you frustrations!
17 July 2010
Rachel on Afghanistan.
Regardless of your political persuasion... take 10 minutes and watch this piece by Rachel Maddow. She brings up a littany of of great points and really crystalizes many of the things I've been thinking about this war but unable to articulate. And lest you think this is some sort of liberal push... Swiss is a pretty conservative guy and he agrees 100% and thought the piece was very well done. In any event, take a few minutes, set aside any notions of partisan media or liberal sway, and watch this with an open mind, because it isn't about politics, it is about our men and women who serve and sacrifice, and if it is really worth it in the end.
Visit msnbc.com for breaking news, world news, and news about the economy
And thanks to LAW for posting this first.
10 June 2010
Entitled?
Cross posted from LeftFace... go check out some of our other writer's takes on this topic!
HELL YES. Yes, we are entitled. Period. End of sentence.
Then again, maybe deserving is the better term. Certainly sounds less undeserving and snooty, don’t you think???
When I hear stories like the one posted here about the Marine’s family (the one Tom Rick’s re-posted on his blog and raised the ire of some commenters) having to beg to get home with their fallen soldier, when I hear stories about families falling through the cracks because of too few services, spouses giving up hard-earned careers to PCS from installation to installation every 3-ish years with no real help on the horizon, when I hear about programs getting yanked (Hello MyCAA!) without proper notice and without regard for those affected… I get angry. Not because I am a MilSpouse and those issues affect me too. Not because I think any of these programs are The Best Ever. Not because I think that we are better than our civilian counterparts. And not because my family or I use any of these programs. (Which, for the record, do not.) But because someone made a promise to us… someone said what you do, what you endure, what you experience as a MilSpouse warrants a bit of help, warrants a helping hand when your spouse’s career and the Greater Good stacks the deck against you in nearly every way (home life, marriage, parenting, friendships, career, sanity), warrants programs that help you because you are stationed 1,200 miles away from the family & friends that would normally lend a hand, warrants the respect and compassion of the civilian world who really have NO idea what it is like to be one of us. And they were right.
I think we (Military Families) have earned these programs and the respect of the American Public and I don’t think for one minute that we are out of line when we expect these things to be there for us. I think we are justified in our rage over the indifference of the American Public, I think we are right to expect a little bit of help when we put our spouse’s career (and, again the Greater Good) ahead of all else, I think we are even, sometimes, warranted in our isolation from the civilian world (really, how many times can you suffer through a conversation where someone just doesn’t get it and refuses to try?), and, in case you were wondering, also think that sometimes we are wrong. But I digress.
Saying we ‘deserve’ all this or that we have earned it may reek of entitlement but it’s the honest truth. Why? Because we are different, our lives are different. No matter which way you slice it, we are different from our civilian spouse counterparts. What we do, what our families do, what our spouses do is more dangerous, more treacherous, more risky, more honorable than any (okay, most) of the civilian families out there. What we sacrifice, what we deal with (on a nearly annual basis, not to mention training), what our spouses do is just plain different. We don’t have the choices they do, we don’t have the latitude, we don’t have the control over our lives like they do. We are servants of the DoD. By choice. So they don’t have to be. So yeah, we deserve it. And we earned it.
Of course, we volunteered for this, yes, we chose this life. BUT. That is the point. We did what no one wanted to do. We stood up and said, WE will bear this burden for you. We said its okay for you to stay home in your safe and cozy subdivision with your picket fence and American Dream, we’ll do annual deployments, sustain a marriage over the phone, run a household alone, miss holidays, miss births, cram in weddings on R&R, all while living in fear of a dark sedan, a knock on the door and a future as a Gold Star family.
Did I know what I was getting into? Hell no. I had no idea what I was in for. I just knew I loved a man who happened to be in the Army. But this whole ‘choosing’ business really sticks in my craw. The American Public should be grateful, relieved and revere those who CHOSE to do this so they wouldn’t have to. And for the record, if choosing means I loose my right to whine about it, then I don’t want to hear you whine about your kids or your husband or your job, because after all, you choose them. But, again, I digress.
In light of all this, it is so sad that we get grief over the programs that are out there to support us. When we (rightfully) complain about programs that are either not in place and should be or are taken away, we get called entitled and chided for asking for handouts. To that I say BACK THE TRUCK UP. After all our families sacrifice, it shouldn’t kill anyone to give us a few extra dollars to go back to school and scrape out a new career that may travel with us on our next PCS (which makes the communities we live in better and stronger). It seems perfectly reasonable to have programs or volunteers who offer actual help to our families, from marriage counseling, therapy, childcare, house/yardwork, and some tax-free income. It seems downright silly to question a year of tax-free salaries when the trade-off is bullets, IEDs, suicide bombers, overflowing Port-A-Potties, dead birds in your dining hall, MRE’s, sand in places sand has no business being in and missing out on a year in the life you built for yourself. I’d say we even deserve a bit more. And, it wouldn’t hurt if more than 3 people would stand up on a flight of over 100 and say, here, have my seat, your loved one gave his life for our country and for the betterment of the lives of others (so I didn’t have to), I can change my plans so that you can accompany his body home for his funeral.
If that makes us entitled… then fine, I’m okay with it. Last time I checked no one was asking for free vacations to Hawaii, 80” flat screen TVs and sports cars in every car port (because our “free” housing doesn’t come with garages or basements and they always share walls)… we are asking for support, we are asking for help when the cards are against us, we are asking for the respect that has been earned. And I don’t think that’s asking too much. Period.
*Caveat: Of COURSE there are soldiers/familes/spouses that maybe aren’t on the up-and-up, of course there are some that are despicable and unreasonable, but they aren’t the norm (thankfully).
14 May 2010
Book report. Shop Class as Soulcraft.
Okay, first things first: Why in the heck did I choose to buy this particular book? Because I'm adrift on the sea of careers- wandering aimlessly with the currents hoping to run aground on a job that I don't hate. I can't decide WHAT I want to do, I am should-ing all over myself, and am totally and completely hung up on notions of what a "good" job is. What's worse? I feel utterly beholden to my 4 year degree- like the world will swallow me whole as punishment for taking a job that doesn't make use of my degree. I'm frustrated and confused with an extra helping of baggage. So I thought this book might help me change my view, get me thinking outside the box and maybe, just maybe, give me some direction.
And you know what? It is pretty awesome. And eye opening. Also? A little bit disturbing. But I'll get there... I'm not going to write some dissertation on this book, nor am I going to get all up in your grill about buying it or reading it or whatever... but I guess I just wanted to do a little sharing. Because sharing is caring. Or at least that is what I say when Swiss has ice cream and what he says when I have a tasty beverage. Though, to be fair, I reserve the right for this post to get completely out of hand and turn into a dissertation/book report. Sometimes I get carried away... can't be helped I'm afraid!
Anywhoodles. So, there's this idea out there that manual labor is somehow "less" (in most every way) than the more traditional 'knowledge' labor. Parents don't want their kids to be plumbers, they want them to go to college and become an architect who designs the plans for the plumber. Though, in today's economy, that architect's job can be outsourced, sent overseas, or even delegated to a computer program. What about the plumber? His work can't be outsourced, it can't be done by a computer, and no one wants an inexperienced amateur doing their plumbing work. Plus, he gets to charge you about $80/hour for your troubles because he is an expert. Hmmm. I never made $80 an hour with my college degree (plus an extra degree!)... I made less than half of that. Less. Than. Half. With 5 years of college. Working at a world-famous medical center. As an "expert". Less than half. Think about that for a minute...
Furthermore, Crawford talks about the idea that working with your hands, gaining experience and expertise in a specific trade is generally more gratifying and soul-quenching than talking about theoretical things and doing paperwork and getting lost in the management miasma that is the modern workplace. And I can't disagree with that at all. Not one bit. Not even if I tried. Think about the satisfaction you get from making a spectacular meal, or harvesting the vegetables from the garden you planted, or the admiration and pride you get from seeing the quilt you imagined, completed and on the bed. Think about how gratifying it is to do something well and have concrete proof of your skills. Doing a photo shoot and getting so many wonderful shots you have to work hard to pare them down? That is a wonderful feeling. Knitting a sweater you can actually wear. Building a play set for your kids. Changing your own oil. Fixing the loose tile in the bathroom. YOU did it, YOU succeeded. Satisfaction. Pride. Concrete proof of your mad skillz. I can honestly say that at my previous job afforded me little of that... and what was there? Fleeting at best.
And what of that satisfaction you get at these 'modern' jobs? Pride that you counted inventory correctly? Satisfaction that you didn't fall outside the ridiculous constructs that have been put upon you by the higher-ups? What kind of 'credit' do you get? Most of us never get anything more than a pat on the back or a flimsy e-mail. And where is the tangible evidence of how amazing you are (or, to be fair, your failures)? I never got to meet the person who was successfully treated for their cancer after I made a challenging but accurate diagnosis. I can only point to a theoretical group of people who may or may not have actually been helped by the work I did. We are so far removed, usually, from the outcomes of the work we do that it is hard to reap any real satisfaction from our efforts.
Whats worse is that we are leading generations upon generations of future workers down the "College is the Only Way" path. Worse yet, the academic culture (not always) generally is more about generating graduates rather than thinkers or folks particularly well suited to specific jobs. I've seen students pushed through, I've seen college coursework that wasn't much more challenging than high school curriculums, and I can see how any degree only prepares you for the broad scope of a general topic, it does nothing to actually create someone who will be successful. This culture of Everyone Gets a College Degree! is de-valuing the degrees themselves. Furthermore, as a result we have created a workplace that requires documentation in order to get jobs. You have to have a Bachelors, or a Masters or a PhD to even qualify for SO many jobs... but really, what does that degree say about you? It says you went to school and finished your requirements... it (honestly) says precisely nothing about your ability to do any given job, nor does it predict how successful you will be in any given position.
And honestly, how much sense does that make? For example, Swiss just found a job on USAJobs for a dog handler with the TSA. The requirements? Experience working with dogs or a Masters degree. Whaaaa? Can anyone please tell me how having a Masters will make anyone more likely to be successful in this position? Wouldn't one think, rather, that someone with experience with security or tactical planning or identifying terrorist threats would be more in line with the particulars that would make one successful at this job? I fail to see how an extra 2 years of schooling makes ANYONE better suited to handle a dog in a security based position. School is theory. Experience is practical.
Now, before anyone goes thinking I'm here to bash the higher education system... that is far from the truth. I have a Bachelors and I learned a TON. It was beyond useful in shaping me, my outlook, my approach to problems and my intellectual understanding. It also served to broaden my view on things, experience new disciplines, opinions, cultures, etc. College is WONDERFUL for many people. And for some, the desired careers (understandably and appropriately) require these advanced degrees... professors, research scientists, doctors, policy analysts, lawyers, etc. The common thread to all of these (and simmilar) types of jobs is that the knowledge necessary to do to job well goes beyond what can be gained in 4 years as an undergraduate. This makes sense and I wouldn't dream of changing it. In these positions, having those advanced degrees actually does say something about you and your ability to do these jobs.
But getting back on point... the book does a pretty amazing job illustrating the struggles I've had with working in big-business corporate America. And yes, a large hospital totally qualifies. Though I loved working there, it was more of a result of the amazing people I worked with and less about the job and its structure. I found my frustrations arose with the variable and inarticulate nature of the generally accepted management approach (through little fault of the actual managers), the lack of direct exposure to the results of my work, and the touchy-feely-make-everyone-happy-even-if-they-aren't-hacking-it vibe of the modern workplace. Standards were not uniform and ideas of 'team' and 'teamwork' were rampant... all of which only served to minimize personal accountability, give the under performers crutches and punish the workhorses. Furthermore, it created a homogenized environment where certain personalities were oddities that needed more structure and other, more difficult types, were politely ignored for fear of conflict. All of these things are, generally, par for the course because of how the powers that be choose to maximize output and minimize cost. We all suffer because of the almighty dollar... and because we work in terms of theories and concepts, our successes and failures are measured in shades of grey and we all know that we can be replaced with relative ease. Not concrete work with black and white terms for success and failure.
So, now that this has turned into a dissertation, I HIGHLY recommend this book for anyone who is looking critically about their jobs or thinking about what new road they want to take in terms of work and careers. I'm not saying we should all throw in our respective hats and become electricians or motorcycle mechanics... but I do think reading this will give you a better understanding of what inherent issues in the workplace bother you the most, and help you weigh the pros and cons to working in corporate America. I, for one, realized that I thrive in environments where I can SEE the fruits of my labor and gain actual pride in the quality of my work, I do better where relationships are formed based on mutual respect rather than under the guise of being a 'team', and work best under concrete structure rather than the pervasive 'this is the rule until it isn't convenient anymore' culture. This has already been invaluable in my personal job hunt... the red flags are easier to see and I am more able to articulate my wants and goals for my next career.
I'm totally interested in hearing your take on these issues and/or your thoughts on the book if you've read it. For those of you currently job hunting... are these things you take into consideration or do you consider them a given and just deal with it? How valuable have you found your degrees to be and what is it, exactly, that prevents you from taking real pride and joy in your work? Do you really get more satisfaction working with your hands (in any way- from cooking to crafting to yardwork) than you do with your actual work? Can't wait to hear what you all think!
And honestly, how much sense does that make? For example, Swiss just found a job on USAJobs for a dog handler with the TSA. The requirements? Experience working with dogs or a Masters degree. Whaaaa? Can anyone please tell me how having a Masters will make anyone more likely to be successful in this position? Wouldn't one think, rather, that someone with experience with security or tactical planning or identifying terrorist threats would be more in line with the particulars that would make one successful at this job? I fail to see how an extra 2 years of schooling makes ANYONE better suited to handle a dog in a security based position. School is theory. Experience is practical.
Now, before anyone goes thinking I'm here to bash the higher education system... that is far from the truth. I have a Bachelors and I learned a TON. It was beyond useful in shaping me, my outlook, my approach to problems and my intellectual understanding. It also served to broaden my view on things, experience new disciplines, opinions, cultures, etc. College is WONDERFUL for many people. And for some, the desired careers (understandably and appropriately) require these advanced degrees... professors, research scientists, doctors, policy analysts, lawyers, etc. The common thread to all of these (and simmilar) types of jobs is that the knowledge necessary to do to job well goes beyond what can be gained in 4 years as an undergraduate. This makes sense and I wouldn't dream of changing it. In these positions, having those advanced degrees actually does say something about you and your ability to do these jobs.
But getting back on point... the book does a pretty amazing job illustrating the struggles I've had with working in big-business corporate America. And yes, a large hospital totally qualifies. Though I loved working there, it was more of a result of the amazing people I worked with and less about the job and its structure. I found my frustrations arose with the variable and inarticulate nature of the generally accepted management approach (through little fault of the actual managers), the lack of direct exposure to the results of my work, and the touchy-feely-make-everyone-happy-even-if-they-aren't-hacking-it vibe of the modern workplace. Standards were not uniform and ideas of 'team' and 'teamwork' were rampant... all of which only served to minimize personal accountability, give the under performers crutches and punish the workhorses. Furthermore, it created a homogenized environment where certain personalities were oddities that needed more structure and other, more difficult types, were politely ignored for fear of conflict. All of these things are, generally, par for the course because of how the powers that be choose to maximize output and minimize cost. We all suffer because of the almighty dollar... and because we work in terms of theories and concepts, our successes and failures are measured in shades of grey and we all know that we can be replaced with relative ease. Not concrete work with black and white terms for success and failure.
So, now that this has turned into a dissertation, I HIGHLY recommend this book for anyone who is looking critically about their jobs or thinking about what new road they want to take in terms of work and careers. I'm not saying we should all throw in our respective hats and become electricians or motorcycle mechanics... but I do think reading this will give you a better understanding of what inherent issues in the workplace bother you the most, and help you weigh the pros and cons to working in corporate America. I, for one, realized that I thrive in environments where I can SEE the fruits of my labor and gain actual pride in the quality of my work, I do better where relationships are formed based on mutual respect rather than under the guise of being a 'team', and work best under concrete structure rather than the pervasive 'this is the rule until it isn't convenient anymore' culture. This has already been invaluable in my personal job hunt... the red flags are easier to see and I am more able to articulate my wants and goals for my next career.
I'm totally interested in hearing your take on these issues and/or your thoughts on the book if you've read it. For those of you currently job hunting... are these things you take into consideration or do you consider them a given and just deal with it? How valuable have you found your degrees to be and what is it, exactly, that prevents you from taking real pride and joy in your work? Do you really get more satisfaction working with your hands (in any way- from cooking to crafting to yardwork) than you do with your actual work? Can't wait to hear what you all think!
Musings.
-I love that Crystal Renn is 5'9" and a size twelve and therefore is "plus sized". Thank you Fashion World for simultaneously making spectacularly beautiful clothes and diminishing my positive self-image. As Uncle Karl says, "...no one wants to see round women." Boo hiss. But three cheers for Crystal- for being both fabulously gorgeous and landing huge modeling jobs as a woman who actually eats food.
-If I see one more Reebok EasyTone BUTTS! commercial I might vomit. I get it. Your shoes will make my butt look like Heidi Klum's. HOWEVER. Even if this was true (which, it isn't because you and I don't have her superior German engineered model genes)... it doesn't mean I would then start walking around in hot pants, bun huggers, or shortie shorts showing my cheek cleavage to the entire neighborhood, mmkay? Also, BTW, I am a woman, you are selling your product to me, please make it look and feel less like a film of a Maxim photo shoot. Kthanksbai.
-I am currently reading "Shop Class as Soulcraft" by Matthew Crawford. I love it. I will do a review of sorts in the coming days, but MAN, talk about a book that finally puts articulate words behind all the struggles I've had working in corporate big-business America. So far he's covered everything from the declining merit of higher education to the futility of 'teamwork' in the workplace to how current management styles really only make everyone walk on eggshells and distance them from the actual goals and purpose of their work. Amazing stuff... and totally making me want to be more hands-on, less cubicle-farmer in my new job hunt. Recommended reading for anyone considering a career re-vamp.
-Speaking of jobs... I've officially hit a wall. I've applied for jobs I'm qualified for in cities we don't want to live in. I've applied for jobs I'm seemingly well qualified for in places we want to live. I got a phone interview for a job in Chicago, but it wasn't quite as-advertised so that ended up being a no-go. I got a "Thanks, but no Thanks" letter from a job I was sure I fit the bill for with the government. I'm not sure what anyone wants anymore and I'm starting to think my only viable career options will be in my previous field, the one I don't want to do anymore. BAH!
-Lastly, I've been doing loads better on scheduling creative time for myself. I am making a quilt people. A QUILT. And the only other thing I've sewn was a needle case for my knitting stuff. I'll post photos soon of the finished quilt but I'm amazed by how this little change has lightened my mood, recharged my creative stores and increased my feeling of purpose. Yes, a quilt has upped my feeling of purpose. When you are a SAHW your days consist of laundry, dishes, cooking and vacuuming and then thinking you are still being lazy because the house doesn't always look just so. Seeing the fruits of my labor, having Swiss come home and be proud of what I've created, getting the satisfaction of actually doing something I've wanted to do for years and have success. It's awesome. And I'm really proud of what I've made. So, yeah, consider this a PSA for taking time to do the things that matter to you. Not just the stuff you are supposed to do.
-Hope you all have a super stellar weekend! The hubs and I are going to a movie tonight (Robin Hood=nummy Russell Crowe) and tomorrow we are having a good friend over for resume building and dinner. Aaah, the joys of retirement and ETS-ing from the Army! Happy weekending everyone!
-If I see one more Reebok EasyTone BUTTS! commercial I might vomit. I get it. Your shoes will make my butt look like Heidi Klum's. HOWEVER. Even if this was true (which, it isn't because you and I don't have her superior German engineered model genes)... it doesn't mean I would then start walking around in hot pants, bun huggers, or shortie shorts showing my cheek cleavage to the entire neighborhood, mmkay? Also, BTW, I am a woman, you are selling your product to me, please make it look and feel less like a film of a Maxim photo shoot. Kthanksbai.
-I am currently reading "Shop Class as Soulcraft" by Matthew Crawford. I love it. I will do a review of sorts in the coming days, but MAN, talk about a book that finally puts articulate words behind all the struggles I've had working in corporate big-business America. So far he's covered everything from the declining merit of higher education to the futility of 'teamwork' in the workplace to how current management styles really only make everyone walk on eggshells and distance them from the actual goals and purpose of their work. Amazing stuff... and totally making me want to be more hands-on, less cubicle-farmer in my new job hunt. Recommended reading for anyone considering a career re-vamp.
-Speaking of jobs... I've officially hit a wall. I've applied for jobs I'm qualified for in cities we don't want to live in. I've applied for jobs I'm seemingly well qualified for in places we want to live. I got a phone interview for a job in Chicago, but it wasn't quite as-advertised so that ended up being a no-go. I got a "Thanks, but no Thanks" letter from a job I was sure I fit the bill for with the government. I'm not sure what anyone wants anymore and I'm starting to think my only viable career options will be in my previous field, the one I don't want to do anymore. BAH!
-Lastly, I've been doing loads better on scheduling creative time for myself. I am making a quilt people. A QUILT. And the only other thing I've sewn was a needle case for my knitting stuff. I'll post photos soon of the finished quilt but I'm amazed by how this little change has lightened my mood, recharged my creative stores and increased my feeling of purpose. Yes, a quilt has upped my feeling of purpose. When you are a SAHW your days consist of laundry, dishes, cooking and vacuuming and then thinking you are still being lazy because the house doesn't always look just so. Seeing the fruits of my labor, having Swiss come home and be proud of what I've created, getting the satisfaction of actually doing something I've wanted to do for years and have success. It's awesome. And I'm really proud of what I've made. So, yeah, consider this a PSA for taking time to do the things that matter to you. Not just the stuff you are supposed to do.
-Hope you all have a super stellar weekend! The hubs and I are going to a movie tonight (Robin Hood=nummy Russell Crowe) and tomorrow we are having a good friend over for resume building and dinner. Aaah, the joys of retirement and ETS-ing from the Army! Happy weekending everyone!
02 April 2010
Oh, America.
What are we going to do with you? Come to think of it, what are we going to do with this whole damned planet?
Now, before I launch into what will surely be an incendiary and contentious blog post (especially since I'm generally Liberal Lite in my circle of blogger peeps, or as I prefer to be known, the Gateway Drug of Liberal MilSpouses), I must give you context. So here it is: Swiss and I have, lately, been discussing at length the environmental, population, water, etc issues plaguing our planet- spurred on by the latest water-centric issue of National Geographic, the Life series on Discovery, and -oddly enough- Superfreakonomics by Stephen Levitt (a must read for sure)... not to mention my 4 years getting all geeked up about ecosystems and global warming and keystone species while in college (Viva Bel-wah!).
So, there have been discussions in the Tucker & Swiss household about how to save the polar bears and what to do in order to slow the increased rate of climate change (Yes, we can debate the whys, ifs, hows, and wheres of global warming for sure- but let's save that for another date, okay? And read Superfreakonomics as homework before we do.) and what/who should bear the burden of making it right. We discussed the culling of deer populations when they get 'undesirably' large and then (over wine, natch) segued into China's regulation of procreation and naturally (some would say) took that to culling people from all walks of life- Not Swiss and I of course! Nor you, dear readers!- in order to get the 'undesirably' large human population under control. Of course this is morally repugnant, but it is also a fair point. Deer and polar bears haven't done anything to make the world the way it currently is- we humans have. So- ergo- we should be the ones to pay. And of course we never will because we run the world with bleeding hearts for all humankind and with policies generally geared toward only looking out for our own human race.
But--- in my sick, twisted, mad scientist mind, I started to think about who we would cull. Sick, I know. But really- who? What countries? What proportions? Would there be criteria? Ah, but then I stumbled upon this article somewhere on Facebook and lo-and-behold I found who we should be culling. Take a minute and read the article... especially the part at the end... I will wait.
Done yet? Okay.
Yes, THOSE are the people we should be culling. Sorry. I know it is crass to say- but... REALLY? I want to know WHY you wouldn't want to get the person who wrote this gem (in reference to the Bible) out of the gene pool: "These apostles need to get a clue and hire a ghost writer. Even Miley Cyrus's manager was smart enough to do that." I am stupefied and insulted... and I'm not even that religious! Or what about the people who criticize the writing style in The Diary of Anne Frank... uh- sorry to break it to y'all- she was a little girl, being hidden from Nazis in an attic writing in her diary. IN REAL LIFE. And the ones who chastise (admittedly, my favorite book) To Kill a Mockingbird as "Simply put, this is a novel about racism written for people who received their knowledge about racism from this book!" Wha? That didn't even make sense... and one tiny little thing... I would encourage you to remember that this book was written in the 60's. Not 2010. So it really was a bigfuckingdeal back in its day- and THAT is why it is a classic.
But this one tickles my scientific heart to no end. On Darwin's The Origin of Species "This book is a very interesting work of fiction. Its too bad that so many people take it seriously, though. Darwin had a great imagination, but with no scientific evidence to support it, its just a fable. I can't believe people are so gullible as to believe the things written in here. I'm judging it as a work of fiction. Its imaginative, but its lacking. One star." I would argue, that this individual should perhaps stop by his local library and read every science text written, then read this article about the (notoriously anti-evolution) Vatican. Fable my ass, Homeslice. And then I would encourage this person to get on the evolutionary-Darwinian train and ride it all the way into extinction.
See, these are the people that suck the life out of my faith in humanity and the power of human intelligence. These are the folks who, against all odds, still survive- nee, thrive- in this world despite their alarming lack of mental fortitude and intellect. And, sadly, I would counter that folks like these ain't making any situation we, as a world, find ourselves in any better. Because if you sit down to read Charlotte's Web and come away with this "Even as a child I found the plot very far-fetched. It is because of this horrid book that I eat sausage every morning and tell my dad to kill every spider I see. It is a traumatic, coma-enducing story that has changed my life forever. In conclusion I feel no one should be put through such torture and this book should be banned from every school, library, and bookstore in the Milky Way."? Well, I'd be lying if I said I wouldn't prefer it if you stopped using up all the oxygen and drinking all the water and slowly killing off those cuddly (not really) polar bears, thankyouverymuch.
So, sadly, yes... indeed these fabled 1 star reviews do leave me, as the article's author Jeanette DeMain said they would, "profoundly disheartened and pessimistic about the continued existence of humankind."...and more and more in favor of some good old fashioned culling. Evil, I know. But its the less threatening brand of evil that is just a teensey bit endearing... right???
Now, before I launch into what will surely be an incendiary and contentious blog post (especially since I'm generally Liberal Lite in my circle of blogger peeps, or as I prefer to be known, the Gateway Drug of Liberal MilSpouses), I must give you context. So here it is: Swiss and I have, lately, been discussing at length the environmental, population, water, etc issues plaguing our planet- spurred on by the latest water-centric issue of National Geographic, the Life series on Discovery, and -oddly enough- Superfreakonomics by Stephen Levitt (a must read for sure)... not to mention my 4 years getting all geeked up about ecosystems and global warming and keystone species while in college (Viva Bel-wah!).
So, there have been discussions in the Tucker & Swiss household about how to save the polar bears and what to do in order to slow the increased rate of climate change (Yes, we can debate the whys, ifs, hows, and wheres of global warming for sure- but let's save that for another date, okay? And read Superfreakonomics as homework before we do.) and what/who should bear the burden of making it right. We discussed the culling of deer populations when they get 'undesirably' large and then (over wine, natch) segued into China's regulation of procreation and naturally (some would say) took that to culling people from all walks of life- Not Swiss and I of course! Nor you, dear readers!- in order to get the 'undesirably' large human population under control. Of course this is morally repugnant, but it is also a fair point. Deer and polar bears haven't done anything to make the world the way it currently is- we humans have. So- ergo- we should be the ones to pay. And of course we never will because we run the world with bleeding hearts for all humankind and with policies generally geared toward only looking out for our own human race.
But--- in my sick, twisted, mad scientist mind, I started to think about who we would cull. Sick, I know. But really- who? What countries? What proportions? Would there be criteria? Ah, but then I stumbled upon this article somewhere on Facebook and lo-and-behold I found who we should be culling. Take a minute and read the article... especially the part at the end... I will wait.
Done yet? Okay.
Yes, THOSE are the people we should be culling. Sorry. I know it is crass to say- but... REALLY? I want to know WHY you wouldn't want to get the person who wrote this gem (in reference to the Bible) out of the gene pool: "These apostles need to get a clue and hire a ghost writer. Even Miley Cyrus's manager was smart enough to do that." I am stupefied and insulted... and I'm not even that religious! Or what about the people who criticize the writing style in The Diary of Anne Frank... uh- sorry to break it to y'all- she was a little girl, being hidden from Nazis in an attic writing in her diary. IN REAL LIFE. And the ones who chastise (admittedly, my favorite book) To Kill a Mockingbird as "Simply put, this is a novel about racism written for people who received their knowledge about racism from this book!" Wha? That didn't even make sense... and one tiny little thing... I would encourage you to remember that this book was written in the 60's. Not 2010. So it really was a bigfuckingdeal back in its day- and THAT is why it is a classic.
But this one tickles my scientific heart to no end. On Darwin's The Origin of Species "This book is a very interesting work of fiction. Its too bad that so many people take it seriously, though. Darwin had a great imagination, but with no scientific evidence to support it, its just a fable. I can't believe people are so gullible as to believe the things written in here. I'm judging it as a work of fiction. Its imaginative, but its lacking. One star." I would argue, that this individual should perhaps stop by his local library and read every science text written, then read this article about the (notoriously anti-evolution) Vatican. Fable my ass, Homeslice. And then I would encourage this person to get on the evolutionary-Darwinian train and ride it all the way into extinction.
See, these are the people that suck the life out of my faith in humanity and the power of human intelligence. These are the folks who, against all odds, still survive- nee, thrive- in this world despite their alarming lack of mental fortitude and intellect. And, sadly, I would counter that folks like these ain't making any situation we, as a world, find ourselves in any better. Because if you sit down to read Charlotte's Web and come away with this "Even as a child I found the plot very far-fetched. It is because of this horrid book that I eat sausage every morning and tell my dad to kill every spider I see. It is a traumatic, coma-enducing story that has changed my life forever. In conclusion I feel no one should be put through such torture and this book should be banned from every school, library, and bookstore in the Milky Way."? Well, I'd be lying if I said I wouldn't prefer it if you stopped using up all the oxygen and drinking all the water and slowly killing off those cuddly (not really) polar bears, thankyouverymuch.
So, sadly, yes... indeed these fabled 1 star reviews do leave me, as the article's author Jeanette DeMain said they would, "profoundly disheartened and pessimistic about the continued existence of humankind."...and more and more in favor of some good old fashioned culling. Evil, I know. But its the less threatening brand of evil that is just a teensey bit endearing... right???
10 March 2010
A PSA for your lady bits.
We now interrupt the regularly scheduled bitching and posting for an important Public Service Announcement about your Lady Parts.
WAIT! Don't get nervous- it isn't pervy! I promise! Really, really, PLEASE just take a minute to read this because it is incredibly important for you, your daughters, your friends, your family members and every woman you know. Did I convince you to keep reading? Okay- Great! Let's get started!!!
I am a trained Cytotechnologist, which in a nutshell means I look at Pap Smears (amongst other things) through microscopes to diagnose infections, dysplasia and cancer. So I'm not making this stuff up... this is a truly qualified position I am taking and I have spent years learning, researching, studying and seeing this stuff every day. It is SUPER important and nothing to be taken lightly.
With that said, here are the 4 most important things I can tell you about your Lady Part Health:
1.) Get your annual Pap Smear (unless you've had 3 negatives in a row, in which case you can get one every 3 years barring no changes in sexual partners - or your partner's partners- or other health concerns, but don't take my word for it, consult with your doctor). I know it isn't fun to be all spread eagle in the stirrups and the speculum and the general awkwardness of it all- but this is one of the VERY few tests out there that can detect pre-cancerous cells, and we all know early detection is key in treating anything. It is easy, always covered by your insurance and has the ability to save a lot of drama, fear and uncomfortable/invasive procedures in the long run.
2.) Get the HPV Vaccination. It's pharmaceutical name is Gardasil and it is a quadravalent (4) vaccine administered 3 times at specific intervals. If you are over the age of 26 (which most of us are) it won't work for you (Why? Because likely you have already been exposed to at least one form of the HPV virus so it is not effective anymore)... but please, please consider getting it for your daughters (any time after the age of 9, but it must be before the onset of sexual activity). I know that there are some moral/religious/sex ed issues but hear me out:
This vaccine guards against four types of the (very common) HPV virus. The two most common types (6 and 11) are responsible for what are commonly known as genital warts and result in low-grade cervical dysplasia diagnoses on pap smears. These infections usually clear on their own with age, but since the methods of transmission of these viruses aren't 100% known, you can never be too safe. More importantly, the two high risk types (16 and 18) are almost always responsible for the development of cervical cancer and manifests itself early in the form of moderate and severe dysplasia on pap smears. You read that right: IT IS A VACCINE THAT PREVENTS CANCER. That, my friends, is an incredibly big deal. If you keep only this fact in mind, I hope it will be enough to convince you to vaccinate your daughters.
I understand that there are fears that having this vaccine will encourage girls to have unprotected sex and that giving what is essentially a STD vaccine is only embracing and potentially condoning sexuality at an early age (since the vaccine is generally recommended around ages 9-12). I maintain that if you teach your children well, discuss the benefits of abstinence, sex with protection, waiting until you are in a serious relationship- whatever your flavor of sex ed might be- this vaccine will do nothing to erode your teachings. And more importantly, should your child choose to go against what you taught her, she will be protected from a potentially deadly infection. Whatever your moral take is on teen sex, sex before marriage, etc... I hope your stand on preventing cancer is stronger.
3.) Protect yourself! Use condoms. Don't have sex with strangers. And oral sex won't prevent you from getting this either! Men are common carriers (that makes them sound so dirty, doesn't it?) and do not often experience the same manifestations of acquiring this virus. This means you likely won't know if a man has HPV as there are no outward symptoms for most. So never, ever, ever take chances and ALWAYS use protection.
4.) Follow up. Seriously folks. If you get an abnormal result on your pap smear there are 2 things you must do. First, don't feel bad or ashamed or anything else silly like that. Like I said, transmittal of this disease is still largely misunderstood. It is common and treatable and doesn't have to be a big ordeal. Second, an of the upmost importance. If you get an abnormal result, stick to the follow-up regimen your Doctor prescribes. Sometimes these are repeat Paps in 6 months, sometimes they are biopsies, sometimes they are bigger procedures. DO NOT SKIP THESE. Seriously.
As Cytotechnologists and Pathologists, we rely on these follow up tests to monitor the progression or recession of the disease. HPV infections generally worsen in very predictable ways, if you do your part of the follow up, the chances are high that the disease won't get so bad that it requires radical medical treatment (chemotherapy, etc). Hysterectomies are common when the disease progresses (either to cancer or the severest precancerous lesions), but look at it this way. As hard as it is to give up that part of you, there are so, so, so many cancer patients that can't live without the diseased organ (lung, liver, bladder, etc.) and must suffer as the disease continues to grow. Being able to remove the organ in question will rid one of years of invasive follow up tests and continual worry.
I know we are all super, uber aware of the other gender specific cancers out there- particularly breast cancer, but I encourage you all to keep your lady bits in mind when being pro-active about your health. At the risk of getting to graphic on y'all, if ANYTHING abnormal starts going on down there? Go visit your Gynecologist and get it checked out. Post Haste. Abnormal bleeding especially. It isn't anything to be embarrassed or ashamed about. It is your body telling you, "HEY! Get me checked out! Something isn't right!"
So, with that, I endeth my Public Service Announcement regarding your Girl Parts. Please feel free to e-mail me if you have any specific questions about this- I'd be glad to share any knowledge I have or direct you to some great resources! (tuckerandswiss at yahoo dot com) Now, go get your Paps taken care of Ladies!
WAIT! Don't get nervous- it isn't pervy! I promise! Really, really, PLEASE just take a minute to read this because it is incredibly important for you, your daughters, your friends, your family members and every woman you know. Did I convince you to keep reading? Okay- Great! Let's get started!!!
I am a trained Cytotechnologist, which in a nutshell means I look at Pap Smears (amongst other things) through microscopes to diagnose infections, dysplasia and cancer. So I'm not making this stuff up... this is a truly qualified position I am taking and I have spent years learning, researching, studying and seeing this stuff every day. It is SUPER important and nothing to be taken lightly.
With that said, here are the 4 most important things I can tell you about your Lady Part Health:
1.) Get your annual Pap Smear (unless you've had 3 negatives in a row, in which case you can get one every 3 years barring no changes in sexual partners - or your partner's partners- or other health concerns, but don't take my word for it, consult with your doctor). I know it isn't fun to be all spread eagle in the stirrups and the speculum and the general awkwardness of it all- but this is one of the VERY few tests out there that can detect pre-cancerous cells, and we all know early detection is key in treating anything. It is easy, always covered by your insurance and has the ability to save a lot of drama, fear and uncomfortable/invasive procedures in the long run.
2.) Get the HPV Vaccination. It's pharmaceutical name is Gardasil and it is a quadravalent (4) vaccine administered 3 times at specific intervals. If you are over the age of 26 (which most of us are) it won't work for you (Why? Because likely you have already been exposed to at least one form of the HPV virus so it is not effective anymore)... but please, please consider getting it for your daughters (any time after the age of 9, but it must be before the onset of sexual activity). I know that there are some moral/religious/sex ed issues but hear me out:
This vaccine guards against four types of the (very common) HPV virus. The two most common types (6 and 11) are responsible for what are commonly known as genital warts and result in low-grade cervical dysplasia diagnoses on pap smears. These infections usually clear on their own with age, but since the methods of transmission of these viruses aren't 100% known, you can never be too safe. More importantly, the two high risk types (16 and 18) are almost always responsible for the development of cervical cancer and manifests itself early in the form of moderate and severe dysplasia on pap smears. You read that right: IT IS A VACCINE THAT PREVENTS CANCER. That, my friends, is an incredibly big deal. If you keep only this fact in mind, I hope it will be enough to convince you to vaccinate your daughters.
I understand that there are fears that having this vaccine will encourage girls to have unprotected sex and that giving what is essentially a STD vaccine is only embracing and potentially condoning sexuality at an early age (since the vaccine is generally recommended around ages 9-12). I maintain that if you teach your children well, discuss the benefits of abstinence, sex with protection, waiting until you are in a serious relationship- whatever your flavor of sex ed might be- this vaccine will do nothing to erode your teachings. And more importantly, should your child choose to go against what you taught her, she will be protected from a potentially deadly infection. Whatever your moral take is on teen sex, sex before marriage, etc... I hope your stand on preventing cancer is stronger.
3.) Protect yourself! Use condoms. Don't have sex with strangers. And oral sex won't prevent you from getting this either! Men are common carriers (that makes them sound so dirty, doesn't it?) and do not often experience the same manifestations of acquiring this virus. This means you likely won't know if a man has HPV as there are no outward symptoms for most. So never, ever, ever take chances and ALWAYS use protection.
4.) Follow up. Seriously folks. If you get an abnormal result on your pap smear there are 2 things you must do. First, don't feel bad or ashamed or anything else silly like that. Like I said, transmittal of this disease is still largely misunderstood. It is common and treatable and doesn't have to be a big ordeal. Second, an of the upmost importance. If you get an abnormal result, stick to the follow-up regimen your Doctor prescribes. Sometimes these are repeat Paps in 6 months, sometimes they are biopsies, sometimes they are bigger procedures. DO NOT SKIP THESE. Seriously.
As Cytotechnologists and Pathologists, we rely on these follow up tests to monitor the progression or recession of the disease. HPV infections generally worsen in very predictable ways, if you do your part of the follow up, the chances are high that the disease won't get so bad that it requires radical medical treatment (chemotherapy, etc). Hysterectomies are common when the disease progresses (either to cancer or the severest precancerous lesions), but look at it this way. As hard as it is to give up that part of you, there are so, so, so many cancer patients that can't live without the diseased organ (lung, liver, bladder, etc.) and must suffer as the disease continues to grow. Being able to remove the organ in question will rid one of years of invasive follow up tests and continual worry.
I know we are all super, uber aware of the other gender specific cancers out there- particularly breast cancer, but I encourage you all to keep your lady bits in mind when being pro-active about your health. At the risk of getting to graphic on y'all, if ANYTHING abnormal starts going on down there? Go visit your Gynecologist and get it checked out. Post Haste. Abnormal bleeding especially. It isn't anything to be embarrassed or ashamed about. It is your body telling you, "HEY! Get me checked out! Something isn't right!"
So, with that, I endeth my Public Service Announcement regarding your Girl Parts. Please feel free to e-mail me if you have any specific questions about this- I'd be glad to share any knowledge I have or direct you to some great resources! (tuckerandswiss at yahoo dot com) Now, go get your Paps taken care of Ladies!
04 March 2010
Oscar special.
Isn't that all Self Important of me?
So remember that rant I made a while back about how Hollywood always (almost) gets it wrong with war/Veteran movies? I still think all that jazz is true. But with all the hullabaloo about The Hurt Locker and Oscar buzz and by the more famous MilFolk (here and here) and everyone who has ever even BEEN to Iraq weighing in... I thought I would throw in my two completely unqualified cents (you know, seeing as how I've never been to war or Iraq... see? I told you: Self Important!).
I read an interview with Jeremy Renner (the 'star' in the movie) the other day and it struck me as pretty accurate and reasonable. Amidst everyone shouting about how inaccurate it is... the ACU's instead of the DCU's that were standard issue at the time, the incorrect markings on trucks, the cries of "that isn't procedure!" (Bwahahaha!!! Yeah there have NEVER, in the history of this war, been soldiers who went against protocol and did stupid shit. PSAHW!), and "That wouldn't ever happen!" (again, PSHAW!)... Renner said this:
Hell, I don't watch CSI: New Hampshire of NCIS: Tacoma or Bones or Grey's Anatomy and holler about how lab results ALWAYS take longer than that get snippy because that equipment was all wrong and how that diagnosis wouldn't come from a CT scan... THEY WOULD HAVE TO HAVE A PATHOLOGY REPORT FOR CRYING OUT LOUD!!!! I get it, it is a TV show and real lab work ain't that exciting... and you can't wrap up a tidy hour of television with the cast twiddling their thumbs for a week or 3 days waiting for results. Am I right? But have you noticed that many of the MilFolk reviews of this movie do JUST that?
The point is, I think the movie (KEY WORD ALERT!) represented the general gist of living life, as an EOD guy, in Iraq circa 2004 (I know, as if I have any clue). At the very least, it put me in the general mind-space of the handful of soldiers portrayed. The bigger picture? It put me in the streets of Iraq in the middle of a war my husband fought in (this point, incidentally, is agreed upon by most Vets and is the word on the streets- the settings are spot on). It gave me a dose of perspective, a sliver of insight, a glimpse into what it might have been like for him. And that is more than any other Iraq war movie has done for me. A lot more.
Perhaps, in light of all the other crappy movies about this war (see: StopLoss, Brothers, etc), this is really quite a feat. Maybe this is simply a good first step. And maybe, just maybe, that is pretty damned good for a commercialized, for-the-masses, Hollywood Blockbuster.
A film professor (David McKenna, a film professor at Columbia University, via here) said this of the movie: "Hurt Locker isn't as much about Iraq as it is about one soldier's addiction to war. It's a character study, an exploration of courage, bravado and leadership told through "a series of suspenseful situations. I suppose it could have just as easily been set in outer space." And I think that is the bigger point here (at least for me, as a non-Iraq veteran). This movie's draw, its interest, it's redeeming qualities lie not in the bombs or the tactical accuracies or the uniforms, it lies in the depiction of soldiers... as complicated people, struggling to deal with their day-to-day experiences, job requirements, and at-home issues. NOT as batshitcrazyinsane PSTD addled guys about ready to fly off the handle (see: Brothers, etc.).
For me, it was about the human experience of war... not wether or not the Bradleys are marked right. And best of all, it gave me a better understanding- even if only superficially- of what that experience was like for any given soldier. For a movie like that to be in the running for an Oscar? I'll call that a good thing any day of the week.
Have any of you watched this movie? What are your thoughts?
(And PS: here is a link to another article about this, much better written IMHO!)
So remember that rant I made a while back about how Hollywood always (almost) gets it wrong with war/Veteran movies? I still think all that jazz is true. But with all the hullabaloo about The Hurt Locker and Oscar buzz and by the more famous MilFolk (here and here) and everyone who has ever even BEEN to Iraq weighing in... I thought I would throw in my two completely unqualified cents (you know, seeing as how I've never been to war or Iraq... see? I told you: Self Important!).
I read an interview with Jeremy Renner (the 'star' in the movie) the other day and it struck me as pretty accurate and reasonable. Amidst everyone shouting about how inaccurate it is... the ACU's instead of the DCU's that were standard issue at the time, the incorrect markings on trucks, the cries of "that isn't procedure!" (Bwahahaha!!! Yeah there have NEVER, in the history of this war, been soldiers who went against protocol and did stupid shit. PSAHW!), and "That wouldn't ever happen!" (again, PSHAW!)... Renner said this:
“It’s not an EOD documentary. It had to be as accurate as we could within a feature film. But I know some scenes my guys were saying ‘Dude, we taught you better than that.' ... I hope that they just roll their eyes at the Hollywood stuff, let that be what it is. But if it helps bridge the gap between these guys and civilians, helps show some of what they’re going through … I think there’s a lot of friction and ability to be able to communicate one’s life-and-death experiences. If even there’s a fraction of truth that they can use with their family or friends to help show that, then that’s amazing. ... The guys at Fort Irwin all pointed to one guy who would literally walk up to an IED downrange and kick it, and figure if it didn’t go off he won. That’s how he dealt with it. But that’s not standard military protocol."Hmm. I think that is a fair point. Again, as someone who has never been there, I didn't watch the film with the mindset that this was some sort of action-thriller/documentary. Heck no. And I will fully admit that I would't know one way or another if the EOD techniques were sound or not (though I did notice the ACU thing, and it didn't really bother me)... I'm no military expert. But I feel like we all have to remember that it is and always will be, at the end of the day, a Hollywood Money-Maker.
Hell, I don't watch CSI: New Hampshire of NCIS: Tacoma or Bones or Grey's Anatomy and holler about how lab results ALWAYS take longer than that get snippy because that equipment was all wrong and how that diagnosis wouldn't come from a CT scan... THEY WOULD HAVE TO HAVE A PATHOLOGY REPORT FOR CRYING OUT LOUD!!!! I get it, it is a TV show and real lab work ain't that exciting... and you can't wrap up a tidy hour of television with the cast twiddling their thumbs for a week or 3 days waiting for results. Am I right? But have you noticed that many of the MilFolk reviews of this movie do JUST that?
The point is, I think the movie (KEY WORD ALERT!) represented the general gist of living life, as an EOD guy, in Iraq circa 2004 (I know, as if I have any clue). At the very least, it put me in the general mind-space of the handful of soldiers portrayed. The bigger picture? It put me in the streets of Iraq in the middle of a war my husband fought in (this point, incidentally, is agreed upon by most Vets and is the word on the streets- the settings are spot on). It gave me a dose of perspective, a sliver of insight, a glimpse into what it might have been like for him. And that is more than any other Iraq war movie has done for me. A lot more.
Perhaps, in light of all the other crappy movies about this war (see: StopLoss, Brothers, etc), this is really quite a feat. Maybe this is simply a good first step. And maybe, just maybe, that is pretty damned good for a commercialized, for-the-masses, Hollywood Blockbuster.
A film professor (David McKenna, a film professor at Columbia University, via here) said this of the movie: "Hurt Locker isn't as much about Iraq as it is about one soldier's addiction to war. It's a character study, an exploration of courage, bravado and leadership told through "a series of suspenseful situations. I suppose it could have just as easily been set in outer space." And I think that is the bigger point here (at least for me, as a non-Iraq veteran). This movie's draw, its interest, it's redeeming qualities lie not in the bombs or the tactical accuracies or the uniforms, it lies in the depiction of soldiers... as complicated people, struggling to deal with their day-to-day experiences, job requirements, and at-home issues. NOT as batshitcrazyinsane PSTD addled guys about ready to fly off the handle (see: Brothers, etc.).
For me, it was about the human experience of war... not wether or not the Bradleys are marked right. And best of all, it gave me a better understanding- even if only superficially- of what that experience was like for any given soldier. For a movie like that to be in the running for an Oscar? I'll call that a good thing any day of the week.
Have any of you watched this movie? What are your thoughts?
(And PS: here is a link to another article about this, much better written IMHO!)
26 February 2010
Reminders.
Last week my parents, Swiss and I went over to the on-post bowling alley for a little friendly competition (the bowling is a weird tradition that somehow grew out of my Mom goading Swiss about how she could kick his butt bowling... now we do it every time we are together). There was a birthday party for a sweet little girl in the 3 lanes next to us- it was chock full of the prototypical young military families all laughing and bowling (badly, just like us) and celebrating. But amongst the couples and the kids... there was a young man. He looked to be in his early twenties, fresh faced, clean cut in perfect military style... his manner was quiet and easy, he was good with the kids... but he wasn't bowling.
I thought nothing of it.
Then I saw him turn around. Splitting the dark hairs of his high and tight were two massive scars. One, a wide path running from the base of his neck, along his spine, up to the middle of his scull. The other was a crescent shaped scar standing out like a sliver of the moon against a field of dark brown.
I didn't pity him, he seemed to be doing fine. Out with friends, an otherwise normal young man, still in the Army, still living his life. He moved without any other indications of permanent damage and while quiet, he had an unmistakable confidence about him. But... those scars. Those were awfully big scars for a man so young. My heart sank.
It made me think back to the times that Swiss and I would be out on post... at the Shopette, Food Court, the Commissary... when you would see the men with the scars. The physical manifestations of whatever horrors they saw in combat... their lasting reminders of this war, this career, the marks that will always stay with them. Maybe you have seen them too- maybe not- living on post, I suppose, make these encounters all the more common. I remember the man in the Food Court last summer with most of the left side of his face caved in, probably 10 surgeries in to the 20 that it will take the plastic surgeon to try and make it look normal again. The man too young to be limping and walking with a cane coming out of the Shopette with a case of beer in the other hand. The burns. The scars. The eye patches. The men who you can't help but notice, but don't want to stare at... the ones who don't act ashamed (nor should they) but who clearly have so much more to cope with, deal with, face every morning when they look in the mirror.
I don't want to be all maudlin about this and I don't want to come off as melodramatic. But I look at Swiss, the bullet hole an Iraqi insurgent put in his calf... his own lasting reminder of this war, and wonder. Just the other day I caught myself staring at the bright white dot, encircled with dark, purplish skin and the oddly smooth texture of it... and I couldn't help but think of how different it all could have been if that bullet was a few inches higher, if there had been more than one, if the insurgent had been closer. Would he have that leg? Would he be able to go out and run and chase the dog and be the vibrant, active man I know? He was a lucky one.
It all makes me feel foolish for the trials and tribulations I 'dealt' with as a twenty-something. The "dramas" and "issues" I had to cope with while in my youth... where not getting a class or a phone call by a guy or office politics were the major trials in my life. I didn't have to worry about what someone of the opposite sex would think of my burns or amputated leg. I never had to worry about sidelong glances at my scars. I can't fathom having to deal with those things, on top of the horrors of war, of facing your own mortality, or the prospect of living the rest of your life knowing it will be colored by this war and the wounds you bear. I can't fathom it.
I don't have some grand point to make, nor do I have an agenda to push in regards to this... I guess I just wanted to remind all of us, for it is easy to forget when you don't see it. I wanted to remind us that there is a cost to this war... not paid in money, oil or body counts. Some of these debts are less obvious... paid in forever altered lifestyles and appearances... paid with limbs and youth and innocence. It is paid, bit by bit, every day by those who served, those who were injured, those who will never be the same.
I thought nothing of it.
Then I saw him turn around. Splitting the dark hairs of his high and tight were two massive scars. One, a wide path running from the base of his neck, along his spine, up to the middle of his scull. The other was a crescent shaped scar standing out like a sliver of the moon against a field of dark brown.
I didn't pity him, he seemed to be doing fine. Out with friends, an otherwise normal young man, still in the Army, still living his life. He moved without any other indications of permanent damage and while quiet, he had an unmistakable confidence about him. But... those scars. Those were awfully big scars for a man so young. My heart sank.
It made me think back to the times that Swiss and I would be out on post... at the Shopette, Food Court, the Commissary... when you would see the men with the scars. The physical manifestations of whatever horrors they saw in combat... their lasting reminders of this war, this career, the marks that will always stay with them. Maybe you have seen them too- maybe not- living on post, I suppose, make these encounters all the more common. I remember the man in the Food Court last summer with most of the left side of his face caved in, probably 10 surgeries in to the 20 that it will take the plastic surgeon to try and make it look normal again. The man too young to be limping and walking with a cane coming out of the Shopette with a case of beer in the other hand. The burns. The scars. The eye patches. The men who you can't help but notice, but don't want to stare at... the ones who don't act ashamed (nor should they) but who clearly have so much more to cope with, deal with, face every morning when they look in the mirror.
I don't want to be all maudlin about this and I don't want to come off as melodramatic. But I look at Swiss, the bullet hole an Iraqi insurgent put in his calf... his own lasting reminder of this war, and wonder. Just the other day I caught myself staring at the bright white dot, encircled with dark, purplish skin and the oddly smooth texture of it... and I couldn't help but think of how different it all could have been if that bullet was a few inches higher, if there had been more than one, if the insurgent had been closer. Would he have that leg? Would he be able to go out and run and chase the dog and be the vibrant, active man I know? He was a lucky one.
It all makes me feel foolish for the trials and tribulations I 'dealt' with as a twenty-something. The "dramas" and "issues" I had to cope with while in my youth... where not getting a class or a phone call by a guy or office politics were the major trials in my life. I didn't have to worry about what someone of the opposite sex would think of my burns or amputated leg. I never had to worry about sidelong glances at my scars. I can't fathom having to deal with those things, on top of the horrors of war, of facing your own mortality, or the prospect of living the rest of your life knowing it will be colored by this war and the wounds you bear. I can't fathom it.
I don't have some grand point to make, nor do I have an agenda to push in regards to this... I guess I just wanted to remind all of us, for it is easy to forget when you don't see it. I wanted to remind us that there is a cost to this war... not paid in money, oil or body counts. Some of these debts are less obvious... paid in forever altered lifestyles and appearances... paid with limbs and youth and innocence. It is paid, bit by bit, every day by those who served, those who were injured, those who will never be the same.
01 February 2010
Let's ruffle some feathers!
"Some people aren't cut out for this military lifestyle."
I've heard that statement, or a derivation thereof, a million times. And I'll likely hear it a million more. The thing is... I just don't get it. I don't buy it and I don't know that I ever will. But let me tell you why before you cite the girl(s) you know and the yadda, yadda, yadda- we all know that girl and we all have heard the horror stories. Swiss lived the horror story last deployment. I'm not contending that there aren't folks who "can't hack it". I'm contending that they are choosing not to hack it and not because they don't possess some special superpower the rest of us apparently have. (BTW- if the superpower thing is true, I want to know why I didn't get issued a cape when we got married.)
Here's my point: What we do isn't really anything special. We take what life and our spouse's employer and our own personal choices hand us and do our best. We act like grown ups and take responsibility, accountability, and we get pro-active. We choose to make it work- our marriages, our life, our careers, our situation, our families. We focus on the good. We act like adults. In some ways, it isn't any different than dealing with other personal circumstances... sick children, ill parent, losing a job, you name it... you choose do the best you can with the cards you are dealt because that is what adults do. You don't get a do over. You don't get to sit this one out. You don't get to say "I don't want to". It is your life and you put on your big girl panties and just DO IT. People do it all day, every day. And you don't hear people say "Some people just aren't cut out for having a sick kid" do you?
Of COURSE there are people who are, for lack of a better word, failures as MilSpouses. But it isn't because they aren't "cut out" for it. I don't even know that that means... is there a prototypical MilSpouse type? Not a chance. It takes all kinds and of the many MilSpouses I've met, the one thing that always strikes me is how gloriously different we all are, yet we all succeed and are united by the service of our families. These spouses who fail are what they are because somewhere along the line they chose to not deal with this life and make the best of it- they chose not to do whatever it took to make it work. They chose to walk away, ignore it, rebel against it, defy it, and ultimately be selfish. They chose to give up.
Life isn't ever easy... and I won't ever contend that the Military Life is easy. It is probably harder than the Average Joe's life. But life, for anyone, is sink or swim. Military life isn't any different. I chose to swim... no matter how hard it got, how little I knew, how tired I was, how aggravating it got, how hopeless it sometimes seemed. Because I never saw another viable option- this was my life and it was up to me to make it work. I married the man I love and he was in the Army- so there was nothing to do but step up and make it happen. One way or another. That is what adults do. We ALL have the choice to fail or succeed. I chose to succeed. No special super powers. No certificate deeming me a prime MilSpouse candidate. I just chose.
To me, when a military marriage fails, it isn't the military's fault. It isn't the lifestyle. It isn't the deployments (though no one will ever contend that they make marriages easier). It is because, at the end of the day, the two people in marriage failed each other. And that happens. It happens ALL the time in the civilian world. They don't get to blame the military- so why do these folks pin the blame on the the Army or the Corps or the Navy or AF or CG? That isn't fair. My guess is that any of these marriages would have failed in the military or out. Because it is personal. Not inextricably tied to the military... you can blame a million things on the military, but the failure of your marriage isn't one of them. That one is on you and your partner.
It just seems like that statement is more of a cop-out or excuse than a reality. An easy way out for the ones who don't want to step up to the plate. Yes, it is hard. Yes there are challenges. But that's not unique to the military. That is LIFE. Some marriages will fail and some will succeed, some people will thrive and some will struggle- but these are personal issues that can't be blamed on the military lifestyle. It is about attitude and desire and being personally accountable for the way you choose to life your life and the consequences thereof. The honest truth is that anyone, ANYONE, can hack it as a MilSpouse. You just have to want to.
But hey, that's just my two cents.
I've heard that statement, or a derivation thereof, a million times. And I'll likely hear it a million more. The thing is... I just don't get it. I don't buy it and I don't know that I ever will. But let me tell you why before you cite the girl(s) you know and the yadda, yadda, yadda- we all know that girl and we all have heard the horror stories. Swiss lived the horror story last deployment. I'm not contending that there aren't folks who "can't hack it". I'm contending that they are choosing not to hack it and not because they don't possess some special superpower the rest of us apparently have. (BTW- if the superpower thing is true, I want to know why I didn't get issued a cape when we got married.)
Here's my point: What we do isn't really anything special. We take what life and our spouse's employer and our own personal choices hand us and do our best. We act like grown ups and take responsibility, accountability, and we get pro-active. We choose to make it work- our marriages, our life, our careers, our situation, our families. We focus on the good. We act like adults. In some ways, it isn't any different than dealing with other personal circumstances... sick children, ill parent, losing a job, you name it... you choose do the best you can with the cards you are dealt because that is what adults do. You don't get a do over. You don't get to sit this one out. You don't get to say "I don't want to". It is your life and you put on your big girl panties and just DO IT. People do it all day, every day. And you don't hear people say "Some people just aren't cut out for having a sick kid" do you?
Of COURSE there are people who are, for lack of a better word, failures as MilSpouses. But it isn't because they aren't "cut out" for it. I don't even know that that means... is there a prototypical MilSpouse type? Not a chance. It takes all kinds and of the many MilSpouses I've met, the one thing that always strikes me is how gloriously different we all are, yet we all succeed and are united by the service of our families. These spouses who fail are what they are because somewhere along the line they chose to not deal with this life and make the best of it- they chose not to do whatever it took to make it work. They chose to walk away, ignore it, rebel against it, defy it, and ultimately be selfish. They chose to give up.
Life isn't ever easy... and I won't ever contend that the Military Life is easy. It is probably harder than the Average Joe's life. But life, for anyone, is sink or swim. Military life isn't any different. I chose to swim... no matter how hard it got, how little I knew, how tired I was, how aggravating it got, how hopeless it sometimes seemed. Because I never saw another viable option- this was my life and it was up to me to make it work. I married the man I love and he was in the Army- so there was nothing to do but step up and make it happen. One way or another. That is what adults do. We ALL have the choice to fail or succeed. I chose to succeed. No special super powers. No certificate deeming me a prime MilSpouse candidate. I just chose.
To me, when a military marriage fails, it isn't the military's fault. It isn't the lifestyle. It isn't the deployments (though no one will ever contend that they make marriages easier). It is because, at the end of the day, the two people in marriage failed each other. And that happens. It happens ALL the time in the civilian world. They don't get to blame the military- so why do these folks pin the blame on the the Army or the Corps or the Navy or AF or CG? That isn't fair. My guess is that any of these marriages would have failed in the military or out. Because it is personal. Not inextricably tied to the military... you can blame a million things on the military, but the failure of your marriage isn't one of them. That one is on you and your partner.
It just seems like that statement is more of a cop-out or excuse than a reality. An easy way out for the ones who don't want to step up to the plate. Yes, it is hard. Yes there are challenges. But that's not unique to the military. That is LIFE. Some marriages will fail and some will succeed, some people will thrive and some will struggle- but these are personal issues that can't be blamed on the military lifestyle. It is about attitude and desire and being personally accountable for the way you choose to life your life and the consequences thereof. The honest truth is that anyone, ANYONE, can hack it as a MilSpouse. You just have to want to.
But hey, that's just my two cents.
17 January 2010
Hollywood and the Military.
So, I'm risking getting into deep water without enough water wings here. (But I will call on e-mails from my very learned and smart and amazing best friend Beth, who has TONS of experience and can drop some serious knowledge on this topic.) However, watching the Golden Globes the last night got me thinking... I saw a clip from the movie "Brothers" and recalled a great conversation I had with Beth after leaving Invictus. We had seen the posters for "Brothers" and started talking about how movies like these color the public's perception of what Veterans are. For better, and mostly, worse. We wondered why most MilMovies focus on the crazed, angry, out-of-control Veteran with PTSD. Why do they all show the dirtiest, nastiest and least common side effect of these wars? But before I go on, let me ask y'all this:
How do you feel about Hollywood's current portrail of Veterans in movies?
Here are a few for you to reference if you need a cheat sheet (obvs this isn't comprehensive):
Dear John
Brothers
Hurt Locker*
Taking Chance*
The Marine
Stop-Loss
Jarhead
*These two movies are nearly universally lauded as excellent MilMovies, not fitting the recent status-quo discussed below.
Cross reference the "big" military movies (leaving out the WWI & WWII fare) of the last 30-ish years (again, not comprehensive):
Black Hawk Down
We Were Soldiers Once
Platoon
Apocalypse Now
Deer Hunter
Full Metal Jacket
The crux of the matter is this: pre-Platoon, all war movies (depicting active duty soldiers or Veterans) were basically patriotic pseudo-propaganda. They were designed to make you feel proud, make your heart swell with patriotism, make you revere and honor the bravery and honor of The American Soldier. None of which were bad things. They just tended to gloss over the more realistic, graphic issues and realities surrounding war. Platoon changed that. It changed everything. It wasn't sterilized for mass consumption, it was raw and real and gruesome and in-your-face. Platoon was everything the previous movies were not. It was terrifying, shocking, eye-opening, and likely left many feeling less than patriotic.
Was this a good thing? Yes and no. Yes, because it de-sterilized war, it made it real and brought the terrors and gruesome realities of war to the forefront of public perception. It thoroughly de-romanticized war and illustrated that these wars weren't full of John Wayne types, there were slackers and terrorizers and greenies and weary career types. Yes, because it opened up the public's eyes to what wars really are and what our Veterans really went through.
But on the other hand... as revolutionary and eye-opening as it was... it created a reason for fear. A reason to fear and keep Veterans at a distance. It showed the dirty under-belly of combat, it showed the reasons why so many Veterans had mental health issues, coping issues, health issues, why some became so detached from society, why some never recovered from their tours. Keeping Veterans at a distance became the new norm... not men (and women) to be honored and revered, but people to stay away from and be weary of. Because you never know when they'll snap.
In some ways, Platoon, and movies like it, enhanced our understanding of things like PTST and Combat Fatigue, which is good. It gave credibility and weight to the realities of being a soldier, it gave heft to their experiences and personal traumas. But as these types of movies increased over time, it became the only image of the Veteran we saw in the theaters. When is the last time you saw a feel-good, patriotic military movie? When did you last see a soldier -from the current conflicts- not presented as a psychopath waiting to emerge (See: Brothers)? When did you last see a soldier who wasn't being taken advantage of by the Military, bound to turn into a crazed, gun-wielding Veteran? When is the last time you saw one quietly dealing with PTSD, TBI, or combat fatigue with medical personnel and family members? That's right, Never.
It is all about the new cliche Hollywood has created for our Veterans. And admit it, you know it: The guy who just isn't the same as he was before the war... the guy unwilling to discuss the horrors of war, with a terrifying temper just a wrong word/action/sound/memory away. The guy who can't differentiate between reality and war. The guy who is just one wrong move away from blowing everyone away. Your worst nightmare wearing the cloak of PSTD and on a steroids. THAT is the perception of Veterans Hollywood has given the masses since the '70's.
Okay, I hear you. They are just movies. They aren't real... movies are the same places we go to for princesses, Marvel Comic heroes, men who age backwards, romanticized historical epics and ridiculous romantic comedies. We don't think those are real... why would we think THIS was real? But then I ask you this: How many of you have watched a romantic comedy at some point in your life and thought, "That could happen to me!". How many of you have watched an epic historical drama and thought, "Yes, that is EXACTLY how it was... no body odor, beautiful people, and good teeth!". Whether we like it or not, how Hollywood chooses to portray things DOES color our view of those things... assuming we don't have first-hand knowledge to tell us otherwise.
Therein lies the issue. It all comes back to the 1%. Only 1% of movie-goers (give or take an educated few) have ANYTHING to cross reference these stereotypes/cliches against. So where does that leave us? 99% of moviegoers think this is the reality, or at least some permutation of the truth. "Crazy-on-the-verge-of-going-Postal" is what goes on in a Veteran's head. This is why you shouldn't get too close or ask too many questions. The sad trickle-down-effect? A higher Veteran unemployment rate - no one wants to hire the Vet who just might go crazy. It is the obvious disconnect between the public and the Veterans in their communities. It is why funding for Veteran health care (including mental health) gets voted down. It is why people bitch about the Post-911 GI Bill not being fair for everyone else.
I'm interested to know what you all think about this. Have I taken the argument too far? Is there really no discernible link between these stereotypes, Hollywood and Vet unemployment rates? Or is this real? Is this something we need to combat? What do YOU think about the stereotypes Hollywood has created for our Veterans?
01 December 2009
Military musings.
Ugh. So the surge. THE SURGE. It has already sparked debate in my household... I agree with the plan (this would be the "shitting" portion of my previously held position of "shit or get off the pot") generally speaking... even though I know as well as most of you what this surge means... and I hate the price that we will have to pay for success.
It means extended tours. It means increasing the OpTempo once again. It means tapping into a well that is already running dry. And worst of all, it means that my friends, my military family (and possibly Swiss and I), will have to pay the price... paid with fear, worry, trepidation, loneliness, holidays spent alone, a year without their loved ones, living with the omnipresent cloud of a loved one at war... every day. It will be paid with blood, sweat and tears. It will be paid with lives lost too soon. It will be paid with young widows and children who will never grow up with two parents.
I shudder to think about all of the other families getting ready for this surge. The ones who will leave yet this month... the ones who are getting the calls to ready for deployment. The ones who's hearts sunk when the final word broke today- knowing full well their families would be the ones bearing the burden. The ones who's lives will be put through the ringer (wringer?) in every imaginable way. The ones who will live this next year on the edge of their seats... afraid of the news, the phone ringing, the unfamiliar sedan in front of the house... the ones who will live in fear of the ringing of their doorbell.
But more than anything... watching the CBS News and hearing the reporter say that these troops would be there for "just one year"... my temper flared, my voice rose two octaves and I was using my outside voice inside. JUST ONE YEAR? Just. One. Year. *gasp* I've lived that year. I'm still living it. There is no "just" in one year. That is every holiday spent alone. That is 360-ish nights alone in your large bed meant for two. That is a full year of mowing the lawn, raking every leaf, shoveling every last snowfall alone. That is a full year of involuntary single parenthood. That is countless missed birthdays... missed first steps... missed first anniversaries... missed nights spent like any other normal couple across this country. There is no "just" in a year.
Inevitably, my rant turned into my least favorite (and admittedly touchiest) subject. "They signed up for this." And you know who said it? My parents. My blood began to boil. My rationality went out the window. I KNOW he chose this. But in no way, shape or form does that make this easy or fun or not horrible. And then I was told that "that isn't what I meant, it isn't personal". How could it not be personal? These are real people who have to enact this surge... families torn apart... IT IS, AT IT'S VERY ROOT, PERSONAL. It couldn't not be personal, if for no other reason, because this surge could lead to Swiss's retirement paperwork being denied. Which means he will be part of this surge. Another war. Another deployment. Another round of God Please Just Bring Him Home, every night, every day. How much more personal could it be?
I don't think I will ever get over how disconnected the American public is from this military lifestyle and all it entails. I understand that living it gives one a unique understanding an outsider could never match (Maude knows I didn't get it until I lived it). But I don't see how the general public can be so flippant about it. "Its their job." "Its about time." "They should send more" ... I want to shout that there aren't more to send.... they can't keep this up... this is taking its toll in ways you can't even begin to fathom!!! But I know, no matter how I say it, it will fall on deaf ears... because it isn't their spouse. It isn't their kid. It isn't their sibling. And it isn't their concern. It's just another talking point... another way to grade a President... another game to armchair quarterback. And it isn't personal.
So, to all of you who are or will be touched by this: May your loved ones come home safely, may this conflict end swiftly and without loss, and may your family, friends and whomever you pray to give you the comfort, support, love and reassurance you need. And know that I will be here for you.
It means extended tours. It means increasing the OpTempo once again. It means tapping into a well that is already running dry. And worst of all, it means that my friends, my military family (and possibly Swiss and I), will have to pay the price... paid with fear, worry, trepidation, loneliness, holidays spent alone, a year without their loved ones, living with the omnipresent cloud of a loved one at war... every day. It will be paid with blood, sweat and tears. It will be paid with lives lost too soon. It will be paid with young widows and children who will never grow up with two parents.
I shudder to think about all of the other families getting ready for this surge. The ones who will leave yet this month... the ones who are getting the calls to ready for deployment. The ones who's hearts sunk when the final word broke today- knowing full well their families would be the ones bearing the burden. The ones who's lives will be put through the ringer (wringer?) in every imaginable way. The ones who will live this next year on the edge of their seats... afraid of the news, the phone ringing, the unfamiliar sedan in front of the house... the ones who will live in fear of the ringing of their doorbell.
But more than anything... watching the CBS News and hearing the reporter say that these troops would be there for "just one year"... my temper flared, my voice rose two octaves and I was using my outside voice inside. JUST ONE YEAR? Just. One. Year. *gasp* I've lived that year. I'm still living it. There is no "just" in one year. That is every holiday spent alone. That is 360-ish nights alone in your large bed meant for two. That is a full year of mowing the lawn, raking every leaf, shoveling every last snowfall alone. That is a full year of involuntary single parenthood. That is countless missed birthdays... missed first steps... missed first anniversaries... missed nights spent like any other normal couple across this country. There is no "just" in a year.
Inevitably, my rant turned into my least favorite (and admittedly touchiest) subject. "They signed up for this." And you know who said it? My parents. My blood began to boil. My rationality went out the window. I KNOW he chose this. But in no way, shape or form does that make this easy or fun or not horrible. And then I was told that "that isn't what I meant, it isn't personal". How could it not be personal? These are real people who have to enact this surge... families torn apart... IT IS, AT IT'S VERY ROOT, PERSONAL. It couldn't not be personal, if for no other reason, because this surge could lead to Swiss's retirement paperwork being denied. Which means he will be part of this surge. Another war. Another deployment. Another round of God Please Just Bring Him Home, every night, every day. How much more personal could it be?
I don't think I will ever get over how disconnected the American public is from this military lifestyle and all it entails. I understand that living it gives one a unique understanding an outsider could never match (Maude knows I didn't get it until I lived it). But I don't see how the general public can be so flippant about it. "Its their job." "Its about time." "They should send more" ... I want to shout that there aren't more to send.... they can't keep this up... this is taking its toll in ways you can't even begin to fathom!!! But I know, no matter how I say it, it will fall on deaf ears... because it isn't their spouse. It isn't their kid. It isn't their sibling. And it isn't their concern. It's just another talking point... another way to grade a President... another game to armchair quarterback. And it isn't personal.
So, to all of you who are or will be touched by this: May your loved ones come home safely, may this conflict end swiftly and without loss, and may your family, friends and whomever you pray to give you the comfort, support, love and reassurance you need. And know that I will be here for you.
19 April 2009
2 cents.
So I was putzing around the interwebs this Sunday morning, sipping my coffee (mmmm hazelnut) and letting the plethora of links and stories lead me where they may. Sort of like a grown-up Choose Your Own Adventure book (I looooooved those as a kid). Anyway, I came across this story, which then led me to this story. And you know what struck me, well, other than that I was reading OpEd articles about American Idol? This:
I guess there is only one way to find out and American will have its say in a few short weeks. I'm hoping for the best and that eyeliner and internet photos aren't the only things he is judged on. You can do it America! I have faith in you!!!
"Which brings up the elephant in the room: Adam's gayness. (He has not actually come out, but pictures of him kissing men and a video of him saying that women are not his preference are all over the Internet.) No gay man has ever won "Idol," which raises the sociopolitical stakes of the show's finale considerably. If Adam loses, will it be because of homophobia?"SERIOUSLY? This is beyond ridiculous... and this isn't even about AI. This is about someone who is insanely talented by any measure. His sexual orientation doesn't affect his talent and it shouldn't preclude him from the success he rightfully deserves (not that he won't have success if he doesn't win, heck my Mom is in love with the kid and would by his album). But is America really this shallow? Are we really that concerned with the sexual preferences of its artists? Are we willing to shortchange someone just because of who they may or may not like to kiss?
I guess there is only one way to find out and American will have its say in a few short weeks. I'm hoping for the best and that eyeliner and internet photos aren't the only things he is judged on. You can do it America! I have faith in you!!!
08 April 2009
Exactly!!!
So I am in the middle of reading "I Love a Man in Uniform" by Lily Burana (which is excellent and super engaging BTW) and I just came across a nugget of wisdom and insight that had me instantly running over to my computer to post about it. Here it is:
YES! That is the problem! That is why we have LeftFace! That is why we are trying to open up the dialogue about what it means to be a military spouse and how to reconcile personal opinions (and politics) with our husband's careers and the culture of the military.
It isn't about bashing one view or extolling the virtues of any given political party. It is about SHARING. It is about the exchange of thoughts and ideas. It is about openly and honestly talking about the very issues that our loved ones must enact. We SHOULD be talking about this war. We MUST be questioning policies. We NEED to engage each other about these topics! Why? Because every last bit of these policies directly effect us, the 1%. I refuse to just take what someone (especially our government, regardless of who is running it) tells me at face value. I was taught to think outside the box, to analyze the situations, problems and resolutions in front of me. I was molded into a critical thinker, not only by my parents, but by my educational institutions and my life experiences. None of that changed when I became an Army wife.
Just because we are military, doesn't negate our ability (and right) to be critical, challenging and open minded. It doesn't renege our right to question and debate the policies, politicians and government who we are inextricably tied to. And engaging in these thoughtful, open, honest and critical debates does NOT make me unpatriotic, it does not make me a bad military spouse and it most certainly does not lessen my pride in our armed forces, our country or my husband. Thankyouverymuch.
"The weirdest thing about West Point? No one discussed the war. ... In my "civilian" friendships, your opinion is like your fingerprint, a critical marker of your identity. We talked about the war all the time, pro or con. It was a political football tossed back and forth in constant conversational play. But at West Point, I never conversed about the political or moral ramifications of the war. ... The depth of candor surrounding the domestic ramifications of the current conflict was astonishing. But what we thought of the war itself? It never came up. Not even once." -Lily Burana
YES! That is the problem! That is why we have LeftFace! That is why we are trying to open up the dialogue about what it means to be a military spouse and how to reconcile personal opinions (and politics) with our husband's careers and the culture of the military.
It isn't about bashing one view or extolling the virtues of any given political party. It is about SHARING. It is about the exchange of thoughts and ideas. It is about openly and honestly talking about the very issues that our loved ones must enact. We SHOULD be talking about this war. We MUST be questioning policies. We NEED to engage each other about these topics! Why? Because every last bit of these policies directly effect us, the 1%. I refuse to just take what someone (especially our government, regardless of who is running it) tells me at face value. I was taught to think outside the box, to analyze the situations, problems and resolutions in front of me. I was molded into a critical thinker, not only by my parents, but by my educational institutions and my life experiences. None of that changed when I became an Army wife.
Just because we are military, doesn't negate our ability (and right) to be critical, challenging and open minded. It doesn't renege our right to question and debate the policies, politicians and government who we are inextricably tied to. And engaging in these thoughtful, open, honest and critical debates does NOT make me unpatriotic, it does not make me a bad military spouse and it most certainly does not lessen my pride in our armed forces, our country or my husband. Thankyouverymuch.
27 March 2009
Aw heck... here it is: PTSD and Grey's Anatomy?
So last night I was watching TV because my husband is deployed and that is what I do. Grey’s Anatomy came on and I’ll admit that I’ve gotten sucked back into the show this season. Izzy is dying and McDreamy is thinking of quitting and will he propose to Meredith?… good drama! But, the character I have been most intrigued by is Dr. Owen Hunt (Kevin McKidd). See, Owen is a former Major in the Army, a trauma surgeon for the past 3 years in Iraq (I don’t know how that happens but we are going with it because it is TV and not reality). He’s got some issues and he has just started a relationship with a fellow doctor, Cristina Yang ( Sandra Oh).
The show has been building up to a crescendo with these two for some time. About a month ago there was a story-line with Owen where his fiance shows up to the hospital and is aghast when she sees him because she didn’t know he was back from Iraq. It seems he cut and run on the life he had before his tour(s) in Iraq- not even his mom knows he is home. Two weeks ago Cristina awoke him from a nap and his reaction was violent- he shoved her across the room and she cut her arm. Ever since he showed up on Grey’s there have been glimmers and glimpses into the mental and emotional turmoil he is trying to wade though. Last night however, things came to a head and really cemented his diagnosis of PTSD. (See there is a point to this!)
The show began with Cristina asleep in bed and Owen resting next to her, clearly he adores her and he tenderly covers her up with the blanket as she sleeps. He tries to fall asleep by staring at the rotating blades of the ceiling fan… and he finally does. But moments later we see him straddling Cristina with his hands around her neck, violently choking her, she is trying to scream but she can’t breathe and is gasping for air while clawing at him to get him off of her. His strength is overwhelming and she can’t get his attention- his eyes are glassy and vacant- he doesn’t even flinch when she is hitting him in the face. Finally a roommate breaks in the room and her shouting snaps him out of it. Cristina runs for cover in the bathroom and Owen first looks bewildered but then starts crying, terrified of what he has done.
Later that day, Cristina is confronted by a friend (Dr. Meredith Grey) about needing to get out of this relationship, that is isn’t okay that he hurt her. Her reply was simple: There is something medically wrong with him, she can’t leave him just because he is sick. What if he broke his leg or had a heart attack? Would you ask me to leave him then? Meanwhile Dr. McDreamy tries to talk to Owen after he has a freezing bout on the helipad (seems the rotation of blades- ceiling fan or helicopter- is his trigger), Owen turns into a jerk, though McDreamy (a neurosurgeon) mentions that he can help him with his PTSD, there are new treatments and brain imaging that can help him get over this. Owen said that he managed to come home with no real injuries, he has all his limbs and there are so many who were so much more injured than him. McDreamy tries to tell him that his PTSD is a real injury and that he needs treatment. Owen walks out.
Later, Cristina confronts Owen in the stairwell, he knows there is something really wrong and he is terrified of hurting her, he worries what would have happened if he hadn’t snapped out of it. She is determined to stand by his side, she says that she knows her limits and she can handle this. But the most touching, gut-wrenching and hard to watch scene was at the end of the episode. Cristina and Owen meet in a quiet room, he asks if he can hold her. She says yes and they embrace, they end up make love and afterwords we see her laying in his arms. She is wide awake and Owen is drifting off to sleep. She wakes him by announcing that she was wrong, she can’t do this, she can’t be with him anymore because she is laying in his arms afraid to fall asleep. Afraid of what he might do.
The show ends with Owen on a CT bed getting ready for a brain scan with Dr. McDreamy at his side…
Did any of you see this episode? What do you think of this depiction of PTSD? Will this raise awareness or does it vilify a veteran? What does it mean that war related PTSD is making it into our pop culture and showing up in living rooms on network TV? Where do you think this story-line will go and how will things end for Owen… or more importantly where would you like to see it go? I would love to hear your thoughts on this!
PS- You can watch this episode online at abc, it is under ‘free episodes’ this one was titled “Elevator Love Letter” from 26 March. I think it will be available to watch after 7pm Central.
UPDATE: Here’s some of the buzz online in the entertainment world about this episode… This
from ew.com:
The show has been building up to a crescendo with these two for some time. About a month ago there was a story-line with Owen where his fiance shows up to the hospital and is aghast when she sees him because she didn’t know he was back from Iraq. It seems he cut and run on the life he had before his tour(s) in Iraq- not even his mom knows he is home. Two weeks ago Cristina awoke him from a nap and his reaction was violent- he shoved her across the room and she cut her arm. Ever since he showed up on Grey’s there have been glimmers and glimpses into the mental and emotional turmoil he is trying to wade though. Last night however, things came to a head and really cemented his diagnosis of PTSD. (See there is a point to this!)
The show began with Cristina asleep in bed and Owen resting next to her, clearly he adores her and he tenderly covers her up with the blanket as she sleeps. He tries to fall asleep by staring at the rotating blades of the ceiling fan… and he finally does. But moments later we see him straddling Cristina with his hands around her neck, violently choking her, she is trying to scream but she can’t breathe and is gasping for air while clawing at him to get him off of her. His strength is overwhelming and she can’t get his attention- his eyes are glassy and vacant- he doesn’t even flinch when she is hitting him in the face. Finally a roommate breaks in the room and her shouting snaps him out of it. Cristina runs for cover in the bathroom and Owen first looks bewildered but then starts crying, terrified of what he has done.
Later that day, Cristina is confronted by a friend (Dr. Meredith Grey) about needing to get out of this relationship, that is isn’t okay that he hurt her. Her reply was simple: There is something medically wrong with him, she can’t leave him just because he is sick. What if he broke his leg or had a heart attack? Would you ask me to leave him then? Meanwhile Dr. McDreamy tries to talk to Owen after he has a freezing bout on the helipad (seems the rotation of blades- ceiling fan or helicopter- is his trigger), Owen turns into a jerk, though McDreamy (a neurosurgeon) mentions that he can help him with his PTSD, there are new treatments and brain imaging that can help him get over this. Owen said that he managed to come home with no real injuries, he has all his limbs and there are so many who were so much more injured than him. McDreamy tries to tell him that his PTSD is a real injury and that he needs treatment. Owen walks out.
Later, Cristina confronts Owen in the stairwell, he knows there is something really wrong and he is terrified of hurting her, he worries what would have happened if he hadn’t snapped out of it. She is determined to stand by his side, she says that she knows her limits and she can handle this. But the most touching, gut-wrenching and hard to watch scene was at the end of the episode. Cristina and Owen meet in a quiet room, he asks if he can hold her. She says yes and they embrace, they end up make love and afterwords we see her laying in his arms. She is wide awake and Owen is drifting off to sleep. She wakes him by announcing that she was wrong, she can’t do this, she can’t be with him anymore because she is laying in his arms afraid to fall asleep. Afraid of what he might do.
The show ends with Owen on a CT bed getting ready for a brain scan with Dr. McDreamy at his side…
Did any of you see this episode? What do you think of this depiction of PTSD? Will this raise awareness or does it vilify a veteran? What does it mean that war related PTSD is making it into our pop culture and showing up in living rooms on network TV? Where do you think this story-line will go and how will things end for Owen… or more importantly where would you like to see it go? I would love to hear your thoughts on this!
PS- You can watch this episode online at abc, it is under ‘free episodes’ this one was titled “Elevator Love Letter” from 26 March. I think it will be available to watch after 7pm Central.
UPDATE: Here’s some of the buzz online in the entertainment world about this episode… This
from ew.com:
"For starters, I was heaving sobs in under three minutes, despite the fact that I was
well-prepared for Owen’s post-traumatic-stress-disorder-induced sleep-choking of
Cristina. Callie heard the commotion and broke it up, otherwise things
could’ve gone much worse. And that’s just the point. At the risk of getting all
public service announcement here, I truly believe this is a fantastic story line
to tackle — the phenomenon of post-war night terrors that can endanger your bed
partner is very, very real (my Vietnam-vet dad went through this for years, when
I was too young to appreciate the strain on both him and my mom), and few people
realize (or really want to think about) what soldiers go through once they get
home. It helps, in this case, to have a pair of sublime actors handling this
sensitive topic. As good as they’ve been at amping up the romance crackling
between Owen and Cristina, Kevin McKidd and Sandra Oh brought the Emmy
consideration tonight from scene 1."
22 March 2009
Rant.
Did y'all know that for the past 3 weeks my husband hasn't had a proper shower? Did you know that he's been using bottles of water to rinse off... not bathe, mind you, just rinse off? Did you know that there are only 16 Port-a-Potties for over 100 troops, none of which have been emptied in the past week? (I mean, can you imagine the stench? Can you fathom how disgusting that is? I have no words, but I am gagging at the thought of it.) Did you know that Swiss and his unit have spent the past 3 weeks cleaning up trash and human waste from their new location so everyone else can move in?
I'm guessing you know that I am giving the Army a BIG FAT DO BETTER. And of course I know it isn't the "Army" that is at fault... it's the asshats back at the shiny new FOB with all the cushy amenities who aren't bothering to do their jobs, and the commanding officers who aren't making them do their jobs. All while my husband uses bathrooms that are in danger of overflowing with human waste.
Thanks for taking such good care of my husband... and by that I mean not. Jerks.
I'm guessing you know that I am giving the Army a BIG FAT DO BETTER. And of course I know it isn't the "Army" that is at fault... it's the asshats back at the shiny new FOB with all the cushy amenities who aren't bothering to do their jobs, and the commanding officers who aren't making them do their jobs. All while my husband uses bathrooms that are in danger of overflowing with human waste.
Thanks for taking such good care of my husband... and by that I mean not. Jerks.
26 February 2009
Catching up.
Since the fog of this cold has started to lift, I actually have enough motivation to do something more than sit on the sofa. Go me! So, what do I all have to say.... hmmm.
Let's start with Dover. The verdict is in and Defense Secretary Robert M. Gates is opting to reverse the existing policy. At first glance I had a twinge of angst and fear, then I took a minute an read further. (Whoa, what a concept.) This is what he had to say:
In other news, the apocalyptic snowstorm predicted for today turned into only a few inches of wet, heavy snow. Either way, I am SO over winter in the upper Midwest. However, my neighbor Wayne totally rocks because he cleared off my snow covered sidewalks just to be nice. I am nominating him for sainthood post haste.
Swiss is doing well and many of our unanswered questions are finally getting answered in regards to the when, where and how of this deployment. Good news all around. I have started medicating Fletcher (I kid, I kid) with rawhides, he is doing much better.
And lastly, I give the finale of Top Chef two huge thumbs down. Hosea? Seriously? Do better. You really had to go with the tool box who cheated on his girlfriend on national TV and is completely devoid of any personality? Bah. Talk about unsatisfying television. I demand a recount.
Ooh! One more thing... this is SO WAY COOL. I want to do one on my flickr page. Did I mention that I heart flickr? Well I do.
Let's start with Dover. The verdict is in and Defense Secretary Robert M. Gates is opting to reverse the existing policy. At first glance I had a twinge of angst and fear, then I took a minute an read further. (Whoa, what a concept.) This is what he had to say:
"After receiving input from a number of sources, including all of the military services and the organizations representing military families, I have decided that the decision regarding media coverage of the dignified transfer process at Dover should be made by those most directly affected: on an individual basis by the families of the fallen," Gates told reporters at a briefing at the Pentagon this afternoon. "We ought not presume to make that decision in their place."And you know what? He is right. It is our choice. Who are they to say yes or no on our behalf? That should be my choice, your choice, heck- even our service member's choice. I think this is a big step forward for us MilSpouses... I mean, the government is actually trying to do what is right here. They are stepping aside and have realized that, at least on this issue, is isn't about them, it is about the families and the wishes of our fallen troops. So I say well played... and thank you. (And I won't get into all the crazies who are taking this all out of context and jumping to irrational conclusions, or claiming that this new policy is disregarding the wishes of military families... I don't have that much motivation yet!)
In other news, the apocalyptic snowstorm predicted for today turned into only a few inches of wet, heavy snow. Either way, I am SO over winter in the upper Midwest. However, my neighbor Wayne totally rocks because he cleared off my snow covered sidewalks just to be nice. I am nominating him for sainthood post haste.
Swiss is doing well and many of our unanswered questions are finally getting answered in regards to the when, where and how of this deployment. Good news all around. I have started medicating Fletcher (I kid, I kid) with rawhides, he is doing much better.
And lastly, I give the finale of Top Chef two huge thumbs down. Hosea? Seriously? Do better. You really had to go with the tool box who cheated on his girlfriend on national TV and is completely devoid of any personality? Bah. Talk about unsatisfying television. I demand a recount.
Ooh! One more thing... this is SO WAY COOL. I want to do one on my flickr page. Did I mention that I heart flickr? Well I do.
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