31 March 2010

Job applications are a mother.

Mothereffer if you ask me. Big, stinky, sweaty, hairy mothereffer. I cannot tell you how damned frustrating this process is. Actually, I am going to... I am going to tell you exactly what it is about this process that is driving me MAD.

And yes, this is my blog and I'll write about whatever I want! *hmmph*

Just teasing!!! Well, sort of... ;)

Anyway, here's the deal. I am frustrated that I have to have 2 (plus) totally dissimilar resumes going at once. And that each one needs tweaking with EVERY application. I hate trying to translate my super specific experience into something a non-laboratorian would understand. IT IS HARD. And it is exactly what the hubs is trying to deal with dumbing down translating his military experience into civilian terms. Funny. And totally un-fun.

I also hate that simply having a well formed resume isn't enough. I loathe the online forms that you invariably have to fill out- and of course each site is totally different which means you spend hours upon hours re-typing your education and experience and skills and man, it is a buzzkill. I mean, I'm 100% okay with the USA jobs format because you can use those buggers to apply for a plethora of federal jobs, so yay on that. HOWEVER, I just got done putting the final job-specific touches on my resume for a lab job in Illinois and went to the site's application page... Yay! Upload your resume! And what does it do? It's program sifts through your uploaded Word document and auto-fills the information into their wonky online format. And you know what? IT DOES IT WRONG. I spent an HOUR going back through a perfectly done resume fixing all the mistakes the program made. And there were a ton. Awesomesauce.

Lastly, I loathe that a simple application process invariably turns into a hot mess of paperwork, documentation and frustration. The job hunting and applying process is arduous enough that the road blocks some employers throw up are enough to straight up Sink Your Battleship. I can't tell you how many times I've gotten so frustrated I've had to walk away and just DO ANYTHING ELSE but applications. Should it really be that way? I suppose some will argue that it is a way to weed out the unserious folks, cut the riff-raff off the top and ensure that you are getting the ideal candidates. I get that- but do you really want to toe the line of making the process so ridiculous that even the most qualified folks throw their hands up in disgust.

I think, mostly, I am just frustrated by having to sell myself harder than a dime hooker on a Monday (that is a SuperFreakonomics reference BTW) fully knowing the odds of me landing a gig is lower than low. I know this is mostly the norm, but regardless, it isn't fun. Boo. Anyway, that is my rant. I'll suck it up and hit is up again in the morning. I've got 3 gub'ment jobs to apply for! Wish me luck folks!


Kayla said...

I COMPLETELY agree. BF being recently deployed would be so much easier for me emotionally if I didn't have to be doing this sh*t every. F-ing. Night. Seriously. I'm with you Tucker.

Army Duck said...

Aww that sucks! Good Luck and I hope you find something quickly!

Post Tenebras Lux said...

Oh, yes. . . I remember my last job hunt. It is *so* frustrating. Hang in there!