05 November 2009

One is the loneliest number.

For two weeks I let myself forget how solitary life has been. I let myself forget how much it sucks to do it all alone. I let myself remember how much better everything is when we are together. I let myself get wrapped up in how wonderful Swiss is, how amazing life is when we are together.

I let myself feel whole again and it was spectacular.

And now I am back to one. My heart hurts today. I feel empty and un-whole and sad. And I want this to be over.

I want Swiss back. Badly.

9 comments:

Anonymous said...

So sorry..nothing cliche to say, just sorry.
usmcwife8999

kimba said...

You're in the home stretch! Have a beer and start making plans! *hugs*

loquita said...

I've often wondered how I would deal with mid-tour leave if LT ever had a long deployment... I can't imagine how jarring it is to your spirit to welcome him back, and send him off again. *hugs* You will get back in your groove and get this thing done.

Bree said...

This is exactly how I have felt. I allowed myself to become comfortable the past few months & now he's gone yet again.

The good news is we're Army wives, we bounce back, we take it all in stride, & come back stronger :o) Mid-tour's over, it's all down hill from here!

You now have homecoming to look forward to & I am anxiously awaiting R&R. We got this girl! :o)

Bette said...

Sending hugs to you, knowing the feeling all too well. But look at it this way: It's the last time you'll have to do this. You're a short-timer now!

Southern Belle said...

My heart hurts for you right now. I know that feeling all too well, but it does get better. Hang in there! :)

Hilary Jacobs said...

I am so sorry Tucker!!! It is so hard. After I put my soldier back on the plane after R&R, I completely fell apart. Three weeks of not being able to get anything done, letting work and myself go. Finally my friends came with the crazy glue and said enough. It is so hard, but you are not alone in your feelings.

Meghan said...

I SOOOOOOOOOO feel you right now girl! This does suck! I'm so sorry

HellcatBetty said...

That's one of my biggest fears about having Silas come home in February... doing goodbye all over again. I feel for you honey... I'm sorry you're feeling empty. I send the best hugs I've got.