08 February 2009

Newsletter: Week 52

Yes, I am totally stealing this idea from Dooce. But I thought it might be interesting to sum up the 52 (+/-) weeks of this deployment. Sort of like a raw "Here's how it really went down" thing to look back on, no sugar coating way to document life, as it were, during the deployment. So here it goes...

Dear Swiss,

This week sucked. It started when you left and it hasn't stopped, though it has gotten better. It is a terrible feeling sending you off, sending you into harm's way, knowing I won't see you for so very long. I couldn't get over the feeling that our goodbye wasn't good enough, that I didn't say the things I wanted to and that I didn't hug or kiss you one more time... however I suspect that nothing could have made that goodbye good. God willing, we will never have to do it again. We drove back to our house on post and I cried all the way home. I don't like it there without you in it. I don't like it here without you. Apparently, you make lots of things better... like... well, everything. But at some point I got up and started moving. There was packing to be done after all. So I packed and cleaned and missed you terribly. By Monday we were finished and checked out of housing, easy as pie. Goodbye Fort X, for now. See you in a year...

We hit the road in your trusty truck and headed North. That drive is a lot less fun without you and your funny singing and random topics of conversation (no offense mom- you did a great job keeping me entertained too!). Anyway, we stayed in Wichita Monday night and made it home by Tuesday night. And again, I find that home is a foreign place without you in it. It is going to take some time to get used to not seeing you there, not having 2 towels hanging on the bathroom door, not having a co-pilot on the sofa, not having someone to cook for, having all that empty space on the other side of the bed... the list goes on... But this is how it is, for now.

My Mom stayed for the rest of the week. It was good having some company, someone to just be around and talk to... I never was one for cold turkey. But things here are okay. I will go back to work this week on Wednesday, which will be strange after 2 months off. I rather liked unemployed life, however I suspect that working will go a long way in keeping me busy and helping the time to pass. We spent some time with your Mom & Dad too, they miss you but are so proud of you! Things are pretty much the same here as when we left in November... it will be interesting to see how much things will change this year.

In other news, we got a puppy! The one you and I looked at before you left... I named him Fletcher, that's one of the names you picked out and it suits him very well. (He's passed out on the floor next to me as I write this.) He is sweet and quirky, just like us, and you are going to love him... I can't wait for you to meet him! He is a total goof and loves to play... he thinks the back yard is the best thing ever with all the birds and squirrels, I can't wait to see what he does with our dream 20 acres someday. He is a good snuggler too, not near the caliber of you, but pretty good. He is definitely a perfect addition to our family. I just wish you and I could have done all this together... it sucks that we have to do all these 'firsts' as a married couple uncoupled.

Anyway, this week seemed like a monumental task to complete. And I am so glad it is over... only 51-ish more to go! You and I have been able to talk about every other day, so I can't complain too much there. It is always sooooo good to hear your voice and know that you are doing well, find out what you are up to, and tell you how very much I love you & miss you. I just wish we could stretch those 5 or 10 minutes out longer, it never seems like enough time to tell you everything I want to say, the bad connections never help either. But I digress. You are staying very busy and enjoying work, which is great.

I am hoping that the next week will go by faster and that you will find out what your assignment will be and where you will actually be, then I can send you the care package that is all ready and waiting for you! But know that I am doing fine, I miss you like crazy, but I am okay. I've been so lucky to have such great friends and so much support, so there is nothing to worry about here at home. This isn't easy, but it is getting easier.

So be safe, be strong, and come home soon. 51 to go.

Your girl,
Tucker

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