I've decided that Suckytown isn't really all that bad. So I think I am going to stay for a little while. (Don't be concerned... I have no plans to put roots down and stay here or anything!) This particular funk is a strong one and I don't quite have the urge/desire to take it on just yet. So I am going to linger here.
Yesterday, when I was talking to Swiss, he told me he had a tentative date for R&R. Which is awesome, but also still very far away. He told me that it was almost like starting over again at zero, because we've done the same amount of time apart already. Seriously, I almost started bawling when I heard him say "Zero". Ugh. I don't want to be at zero again. I CAN'T be at zero again. The thought of that is downright depressing.
I have also discovered some of the side effects of residing in Suckytown. Maybe it has something to do with the air here, but I can't remember important day-to-day stuff anymore. Mah brain is fried and if it ain't on a list, it ain't gettin' done. I am way distracted (more so than usual) and find myself craving solitude. Not because I don't like people or have decided to become a recluse (though I have contemplated it, but for other reasons), I think just because I know deep down the only person who could make any of this better is the one who is so far away. And that is just the way it is.
But, don't worry about me, I'll be fine. I'm just taking my time to see the sights, get a taste of the local flavor and enjoy the break from wearing the HappyFace (trademark). Suckytown isn't a place I want to stay... but for now, it's just easier being here than anywhere else. Have a great Wednesday everyone and thanks again for all the kind thoughts and encouragement!
4 comments:
At least get a tacky t-shirt and an overpriced umbrella drink while you're there!
Oh, I am on that! I'm still searching out the t-shirt that says "I survived this Deployment and all I got was this Crappy t-shirt -Suckyville, USA". Think they make those?
But the overpriced drinks with the umbrellas? ON IT! ;)
Hope you are well :-)
Sounds like a great plan. I actually liked the solitude as a way of coping. Not to avoid people but I just didn't always feel like being around others when I was in a funk. I would rather stay home and wallow in my melancholy. Wallow away, have some good drinks and just chill.
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